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It actually went quite well in mediation. The mediators in my county are judges or magistrates who are not involved in the case. They are all friends and co-workers though, so of course they talk "off the record" about what went down (judges are lawyers don't forget). Use this to your advantage. The mediation is much more casual and you can speak more freely. Remain calm, have valid and intelligent points to raise. If she is like my ex, she try to turn things into an argument much like counseling, etc. don't FALL FOR IT! Stay on topic. Although the mediator cannot make her do anything, he/she read the players and try to tactfully guide the unreasonable party in the right direction. The mediator's ultimate goal is to get this settled between you without having to go before a judge, at which point the mediator make a recommendation if it does come to that. If you let her show her ass, you should fair well either way. The control freaks with something to hide are usually more vocal and unreasonable. You both be scrutinized from jump street by this mediator, so keep that in mind. They this stuff every day, and know what to look for. Best of luck. 56 single living in the co 83338And yes, so important to remember the Rule, "past behavior is the best predictor of future behavior". Also, to never make anyone your priority if you aren't his. That's the other point. Everything matters a lot more than I do. He doesn't even know that I was just diagnosed with a chronic health issue (MS), and that I am about to lose my job due to downsizing. I told him about both issues but he doesn't LISTEN, he only waits for the first to jump in and make every damn conversation about him and his needs. Thanks so much for your advice, compassion and hugs, Fallout. They were well spent, well received, and much appreciated. Here is what I'll do today: Research my legal options in regard to my marriage. Research info on my health situation. Re-evaluate my job situation, and how I ensure a stream of income if I lose my job. Have a great weekend! lonely married
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