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We've been married over 20 years. We treat one another with and fairness, but the passion is gone. Our interests have diverged. That sounds so trivial when I write it, but really, I can hardly make myself get up in the morning any more. I'm seriously depressed, so I bring little or nothing to the relationship, but I can't seem to help it. Hate my job, marriage is just a structure that needs maintained along with the house, the lawn, etc. None of it means much to me anymore, but to divorce would cause hardships, both financial and emotional, that I don't wish on my wife. (Living on in quiet desperation is the English way ) I'm at a loss. Tired. Keep hoping not to wake up, but I do anyway, lol. Any advice? fuck a single woman"However, one person has informed me that the therapist's job is to let the patient become in whatever way the patient thinks is. So, on the one hand, it would seem that there is no external or universal standard of, that it is % relative. But at the same time another person has said that there are known best practices, another one said that there are people they personally would not because they could not give them neutral advice, another said that it was wise to have lots of options since people are different and "fit" matters in the relationship." So the patient comes to a therapist and says, "I am always spending all my money when I don't need to and I'm in debt and I don't know how to change this, but I want to." Now we have the goal of the patient. The patient's idea of "-" in this situation sounds like she wants to function inside her budget but doesn't. So she and her therapist explore that her behaviors behind it, her feelings behind the behaviors, etc. She come to the realization that she shops for things to make herself feel special so they try to come up with other ways to fill that space without spending her money. (Notice in no part of the is the therapist's feelings, judgments or even thoughts on the issue have any relevance to this process.) I'd the the run of the mill talk therapy. the terms "therapist" and "counselor" are often interchanged often incorrectly. Most often a "counselor" is not a licensed therapist, but a "therapist" or "clinician" is. It is the latter that most likely be following the best practices for a mental health therapist. Regarding "fit": therapy *is* a messy science because personalities are involved. So I not feel comfortable with a therapist who has a certain style or personality. Even though they act within the same set of guidelines personality leaks through. And styles. Within the practice I worked for one therapist's office had incense burning and big cushy chairs and cushions on the floor and another had a desk with two hard chairs facing directly at one another. Or within talk therapies psychoanalysis might annoy some (exploring one's childhood/formative years) or cognitive behavioral therapy might feel impersonal. dating tips for women
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