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I have sole custody of my grandson, I am the paternal grandparent. My was 16 at his birth, the womb donor was 15 both unstable, neither would work yada yada The married (against my -) and of course divorced..were eventually kicked out of my house. was months early, and lived in ICU for months. Was like pulling teeth trying to get parents to even visit ..I gained legal custody after the placed in hostile environment he was 6 months then now he is 5 years still neither parent has stepped up to the plate. Mother is now living with a registered sex offender, and clueless why I wouldn't let the visit anylonger. story short I ended up filing stalking charges on mother after termination of parental rights she continues to post the childs pictures on face book and cries about her "-" and how I have tortured her all these years. (I begged her to or visit, but the sex offender was not welcome) stalking charges stood up in court, however she continues to blast me on her pages family members inform me of these incidents. Do I go ahead and file contempt charges on her or just continue to ignore her childish behaviors? The kid doesn't even know who she is at this point, but, geeze get a life.
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a book ed: "ADD Friendly Ways to Organize Your Life" I began reading this book to mentally prepare for a visit to my dad's place, to make the first dent in tackling the parental hoarding situation. I also discussed the dynamics of hoarding with a psychologist and read about it on-line. I've seen a few programs on TV. An actual hoarder needs to be dealt with differently than a normal person. Guilt, shame, nagging, complaining does not work. They have layers of rationalizations that don't make sense to a normal person. For example, a stack of newspapers might be ed "a work station". Mom refused to discuss the hoarding mess, she would disolve into tears and then not talk to us for 9 months if it was brought up. I agree with the person who said the outside mess is a reflection of chaos on the inside. This is a complicated mental illness, some cross between OCD, ADD, depression and such. When dealing with a couple like my parents, it is further complicated by his resistance to change (he's used to living in the mess), criticizing, and the co-dependent lack of boundaries set in place over a 60 year marriage. My mother passed in so we are now facing the hurdle and burden of the clean up process, with, respect and, a ton of and a lot of psychological tactics to approach this one step at a time. However, you said that the GF is NOT a full blown hoarder. So, reading the book is a good place to start. There are genuine tips in it that can be helpful to tackling a big mess. Book also covers concepts like overwhelm, micro-focus, setting priorities, etc. I prefer the strategy of tackling stuff strategiy rather than one enormous clean out. It be interesting to if GF takes any steps toward bringing better organization to her life. And I'd wait to if she goes to counseling. Learning how to organize her life greatly benefit both her and her. The question is, do you have the, respect and to want to go through this process with her? I you at least try. After all, sometimes people come into our lives to be a catalyst for change. However, if you are a super neat freak, or tend to complain to get a person's agreement or compliance, then I'd explain to the GF that you are opposites in this regard, it is a deal breaker. swinger club in Norway landCute horny teen chat and Thick Girl. white label dating sites
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