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and things are going to change. He's open to what ever needs to be done to ensure DD is okay. He loves her. If he needs to step back, that's fine. Here's where things start to go grey for me. I was raised to always respect my elders. I raise my the same way. I think it's confusing when I tell DD to respect elders but then draw the line at SO and say EXCEPT for him. Only respect him if they are my rules or if I am present. If I've never covered playing with matches or jumping off the roof, then that's my fault, don't listen to a word he says. If you're alone with him, then don't listen to him. I don't plan on bringing in any more men to DD's life. If this doesn't work I can wait ten years before dating again need bj and sex todayYou had the option of living apart. Does that suck swampwater? Yes. But it is feasible for a short term? In theory, yes. You could have sent him to Iowa to get life started while you closed down your life more to your liking. (hear me out) That would have made the transition a *bit* easier, even though you didnt want to move in the first place. Now, he did not HAVE to accept the job. He didnt. But then he also would have been shooting you both in the foot. Better to take the job and make money, than to lose your roof because there just isnt enough money from your job. He have been a bit selfish in packing you up and moving you across the earth from Egypt to Iowa, but he did so because in this economy, and the recession they are trying(and failing) to say is over, a job is a good thing to have. You can always fly home to Egypt to visit family and friends, visit old haunts. But having a income that reduces stress is priceless. You can also choose to look at this as an adventure. It is a to re-invent yourself. Get a new hair-do, a new wardrobe. Take a on a completely different career path you always wanted to try? You have the stuff you can fall back on for a stable career, right? Take this as a positive, even if how you go there sucks. What you make of it matters to how you look at the future in Iowa. black woman
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