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(Of course.) Actually it's not like there are *crowds* of lovers floating around, so this is possible ;-o Also in this case there's a BDSM element, so the people involved are already tuned to making multiple relationships work. A fair amount of negotiating about expectations happens up front. That's one thing I've found very freeing about poly it's not only acceptable but expected that you're going to have those What Is This Relationship talks that seem to make people crazy in non-poly world. If you're interested, this is a really good piece about poly and dealing with the strong emotions it brings out. It's good relating info for anyone, I think, poly or not! married woman looking KalmoniemiIt's easy for us to sit on the sidelines, a messy problem filled situation like this and say she should get up and leave. Ideally, that well be what she should do, but you've got two that they have together in this situation that have to be provided for. It sounds like they're barely making it economiy as one household. If they split and the same amount of money has to cover two households plus if she goes to work the added expense of childcare how is that going to work? He reminds me of my own father who was verbally and emotionally abusive and had anger issues as well as difficulties earning a living. My mother stuck it out, first taking a crummy job as a kitchen worker in the public school cafeterias, going to night school and school during the summers when her shcool job was in recess until she had skills that enabled her to be independent. Then when he had one of his tantrums and walked out she was able to tell him don't bother coming back. Unfortunately there are two in this mix that have to be feed, clothed, and schooled and that has to come first. I think she needs some kind of counseling to learn to develop her own self respect and get some support to cope with this, but in the economic situation it sounds like they are in it's probably going to be from some charitable organization rather than just checking out some normal fee for service MFCCs in the private sector. Maybe her church, but not if it's one of those conservative "it's all in the Bible, just believe in, and woman know thy place" kind of churches that abound where she is located. It's not a good situation, but it doesn't sound to me like leaving is an option at this point. singles matchmaking
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