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closely related that this puts an entire new on any advise I might give you. I have been a stepparent, I believe I'm a good one. I also believe that I took my stepson's welfare into account in every decision I made. Truth be told, I a very large potential here for your to suffer severe conflicts. Especially when you consider their dad a shitty father. Remember, this is NOT a previous relationship, nope, your relationship with the other parent is a current one. One that be there until the day you die to some extent. The connection is unavoidable. One of the largest hurdles for us to get over was the relationship or should I say lack there of..with my stepson's dad. I know my efforts to be a good parent to C was seen and recognized. A key in that was to make if VERY clear I was not there to be his dad. A parent yes, his father NO. The job has been taken. In clearing the hurdles of blended families you also have to show a it's ok to the other parent. You have to bury that resentment you, do NOT look to eachother in supporting it. Do not validate eachother's poor opinion of him and don't seek it. Dealing with the stress and emotions? You bet, most people can relate to the conflicts that can arise but unless there is real danger, not shit you just disagree with but real danger, your job is to also make damn sure your know you aren't going to put them in the middle of the crap between you. That means support when the wants to the father and at times, a firm discussion that they should even when they don't want to. No, no one has been in your shoes and no one would react exactly the way you did. But you are making some statements that reveal your to be a 'mother' to his and wanting someone to show your how a father should act. That's potentially a very damaging mindset. Regardless of 'when' people meet your, your goals should really be reevaluated. daddy seeks a bad girl
growing in different directions. I'm seeing this happen. My wife and I are neither one a bad person, no white trash drama or anything, but we've headed off into totally different world-views and sets of interests and friends. We understand where the other is coming from, but have no interest or connection in that other world. And there was no way to predict this. We've "grown apart." And neither really cares enough to try seriously to bridge the gap. The chemistry is gone. A lot can change in20 years. In this sense it is always a crap shoot. adult chats and contacts Bad IburgI've been with my husband for 9 years, married 3. I met him when I was 18. We have one 5 year old together. Things have really not been going well between us for about a year and a half I've been thinking about divorce for about 9 months or so. We've talked about it we tried counselor told us that she couldn't really help us as we have no connection and do not perceive the same problems in our marriage. Those were her exact words! He used to drink alot and had been physiy abusive in the past but we've worked through that it's not the reason for divorce. He is emotionally absent and doesnt really even know me. I am 27 he is 40 and I am his 3rd wife. He says he is just the way he is and although it's ripping me apart I don't have the right to ask anyone to change. But I do have the right to be happy and so does he. He's already talking to other women. So now were at an impass; an awkward stage where we both know what needs to happen but it's not done yet. We still live in a condo together which we own. Basiy I want us to go our separate ways and work things out mutually. I think that in our case this could actually work out, although I know in most cases it does not. I would like to stay in the home with my so we don't have to throw too drastic changes on him at once. We've been discussing him paying the mortgage for a period of 5 years and half of daycare costs. When the 5 years is up I move and he can sell the home or live in it or whatever, it would be his at that point. We both have crazy work schedules and he is on the road alot so we have agreed to equal time with our but not a set schedule except for holidays. this way he can have him when he's home and wont time if he gets sent out for a week or more. My problem is that EVERYONE including my mother and lawyer is telling me I'm an idiot and that this scenario never work once we are in process of divorce. That I need to protect myself and go for sole custody because of his violent history. I don't really want to do that, he's been sober for a year now and loves our to death. I know this is not gonna be, but does it have to be nasty? I keep hearing how I'm setting myself up to get steamrolled and that I need to take the offensive . I dont want to be that girl but I dont want to f*ck myself in the process horny dates
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