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Porn is non-judgmental; it's there when you want it and it never talks back. Sort of like a pet dog. And maybe that is why some people relate much better with their pets. Now that you have found a person you truly like/-, you are faced with being 'judged' or rated on your 'performance.' Porn is not the issue hear. True, perhaps you should never have gone down that road when you had a wife (sick as she have been) by your side. And there is no doubt about it: one CAN become addicted to pornography. But once again: the issue here is your interaction with a real human being. You say she said "not to worry," but we all know you. Do you need therapy? Perhaps unless you can do it on your own. You neeed to refocus your eroticism back onto a flesh and blood being. This is not always easy. And it certainly is NOT easy to relax when you are worried about YOUR performance. Try this: Focus ALL your thoughts on your partner. Think of how SHE react, or on what SHE is feeling, etc. That is, stop thinking about yourself AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE. And remember SEX is about IMPORTING and EXPORTING: We get turned on by things we want to connect with. Things we don't have. That's why straight men want to incorporate breasts and curves, etc. men on the other hand want to import even MORE of what they want: everything masculine. Focus on HER body on HER thoughts and try TALKING out loud about HER, HER, HER. God, if she is normal, this be a real TURN ON for her. Good Luck! lking to make friends
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