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So, as I'm trying to come to terms with who I am and all that jazz, I'm spending a lot of time reading the internet, and I came across an interesting reply from an advice column. The girl asking for advice is going through the same identity issues (am I straight/-/bi) that I am now, so I found the response extra interesting what do you guys thing? I want you to think of your sexuality label as a favorite shirt. Do you have one favorite shirt for your whole life? Probably not maybe you grow out of it, maybe you move to a different climate and it's not warm enough anymore, maybe styles change and argyle suddenly seems passe. But it's just a shirt, not a suitcase of diamonds that you've handcuffed yourself to. When it's not working for you anymore, you get a new one. The two most important things about this shirt are that you like it and it fits. Only you can decide those things; no one has to wear your shirt, so they can't judge whether it's bunching up in the armpits or if the color kind of washes you out. Tiggy the Saleslady can offer you some suggestions but remember that it's always in your hands. don't let some fool put a shirt on you. And hey, don't overthink it. Worse case scenario: you get a case of buyer's remorse, so you get a new shirt. No biggie. Lemme take a look at you I'd say you're probably a size "Q" for "Questioning." We don't really know until you try it on, though. You don't have to wear it in front of anyone right away, or ever. Take plenty of time to look in the mirror and decide how it feels. People usually determine the comfortability based on whether it jibes with their crushes, their fantasies, their romantic history, their politics, their culture, and their view of themselves. You the shots on how important each one of those things is. Finding the right fit is an, not a science. If the "Bisexual" label feels better to you, then great, go with that. "Bisexual" was a label that a lot of questioning folks used to use before "Questioning" became an option. Some bis are still touchy about that, but only because after using our label as a safe harbor, a handful of former-bis went on to spread the false rumor that all bis are just closeted gays/lesbians. (Continued in reply) mesa guy looking to meet for Falls City
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