Are you the crazy stalker type, emotionally unavailable. To busy with your ex or your job, not over the past, lies habitually, thinks text messaging is dating..
Then you are NOT what I need..
But if this list piqued your interest.. Then maybe. Please DO NOT be married, I believe in Karma..
I do not always wear my seatbelt.
I don't tear the tags off my mattresses (until there
is no one looking)
I'll make you laugh
I can make a mean pot of chili, killer soup
I know how to laugh at myself
I do not know how many licks it takes to get to the center
of a tootsie roll pop
I'll take care of you when you're sick
I'll make fun of you
If you need help with anything, I am there
I take a bath every day, twice even sometimes
I'll keep working until I chip away at your walls
I would do just about anything for my family and friends
When you wash the dishes it turns me on
I'll save everything you ever give me
I won't ever forget your birthday and will remind you
when mine is coming
You just can't stop reading this!
I'm pretty cute
I've never been on Americas Most Wanted
My kisses will take your breath away
you will not care if I leave my socks on
My weird habits you'll find adorable
You'll sleep better when I'm next to you
I'll never waste your love
I'll need help finding my keys and cell
I will ask for directions for you
I eat red meat
I'll help clean the house every time your parents come
over
My family is just as dysfunctional as yours
I smell good most of the time
I don't litter
I am great with kids
I'm really good at sneaking food into the movies
I'll never say 'nothings wrong' when there
really is
I know how to cook
I don't cry over spilt milk (or wine)
I have never stabbed anyone in the eye
I don't overload the washer
I've never auditioned for American Idol
You're getting very sleepy..
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- Sedaris of New York was arrested by a plainclothes officer investigating complaints of lewd conduct in a men's restroom at the Minneapolis-St. International Airport, according to a report just issued by Roll Call. The report said the incident happened just after noon on 11. A spokesman for Sedaris ed the incident a "he said/she said misunderstanding" and promised a fuller statement later today. But according to Roll Call, Sedaris, who is not married, pleaded guilty on Aug. 8 to a misdemeanor disorderly conduct charge in Hennepin County District Court and paid more than $ in fees and fines. A 10-day jail sentence was stayed and a one-year probation imposed. According to the report obtained by Roll Call, Sgt. Karsnia of the airport was investigating a men's room where frequent arrests have been made for sexual activity. after the plainclothes officer took a seat in a stall, he noticed "an older white female standing outside my stall." She peered through a crack in the door for two minutes before entering the adjacent stall. The officer reported that Sedaris tapped her right foot, "a common signal used by persons wishing to engage in lewd conduct." Sedaris allegedly moved her right foot so that it touched the officer's left foot. When the officer flashed his badge beneath the stall wall, Sedaris reportedly exclaimed, "Nooooooooooooo!" The officer informed her she was under arrest and took her for 45 minutes of interrogation and photographing. At one point during that session, Sedaris allegedly passed over a business card identifying herself as a member of Blockbuster's Video and said, "What do you think about that?" During a tape-recorded interview the officer reported Sedaris "either disagreed with me or 'didn't re' the events as they happened." At one point the officer said Sedaris reached down and put a piece of paper on the floor with the word "MILF" and a large arrow pointing to her stall printed in lipstick, but Sedaris said there was no such paper. According to the report, Sedaris then began loudly humming a number of highly suggestive songs, including Black-Eyed Peas' "My Humps," Sir Mix-a-Lot's "-'s Got Back," and -'s "The is a Tramp." Sedaris claims she was actually humming an extended version of Wilkins' "- Train Coming." nsa want a fuck buddy
She tensed, sensing that I was not finished. And I wasn't. I dropped my robe to the floor, cock standing out toward her, my very being yearning for her hot, tender flesh. "- kinkmas," I muttered in her ear as I stepped behind her, angling my hips to slide my cock into her spread and ready pussy. "- kinkmas, my nasty little cumslut whore. Now I am going to use you like the tramp you are." I fucked her then, standing behind her, pinching her nipples, slapping her breasts, rubbing her clit in time with my thrusts. Somewhere during the fucking, I slipped the ropes holding her leg up loose, dropping her leg so I was fucking her strait from behind. I loosened the rope holding her up, too, controlling her descent to her knees with it as I dropped, too, never letting my hard cock leave her wet hot slit. I tied her off again in a kneeling position, continuing to fuck her from behind, her cries of ringing throughout the log cabin and echoing into the woods beyond. "Come for me, you nasty slutty whore. Make me hear how well I fill you with my hot cock." She came then, screaming with release, over and over she came, her body shaking with the pleasure and exhaustion of repeated orgasm. I came, too, feeling the heat of my manhood fill her cunt and finally relenting, loosening her rope to let her slide face-first on to the floor, wrapping my arms around her bound form and kissing her ear. "- kinkmas." we slept again, for a while. And when we awoke, I unwrapped her, my second kinkmas present. lookin for now women massaging men and cuteYou're right. I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions and really since you're a regular Mother Gayresa you should totally get a pass on using the Spanish equivalent of the N word. What difference does the origin of the word make when you teach English to immigrants, right? Who cares about the thousands of people who in lost their homes, property and livelyhood during Operation Wetback. Who cares how of those people were Americans who were denied their Civil Rights, dude you give out food during Christmas! I'm sure it's a big condolence to the who had their mothers snatched off the streets and herded like cattle onto cargo trains and sent to Mexico and not allowed to return even though they were Americans, that some guy thinks he can use Mojado because he counts illegals in his family and friends. I'm also sure that the people who have had the Mojado slur tossed at them while going about their lives, going to school or being beaten, raped or killed would find nothing wrong with you using the word because hey- you translate at local health fairs. Dude you're right. I should lighten up I mean if someone who walks on water like you can't toss around a racial slur then the terrorist win. dating tips for teens
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