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Here is a cut and paste from the wikipedia article on Maslow's hierarchy of needs: All humans have a need to feel respected; this includes the need to have self-esteem and self-respect. Esteem presents the typical human to be accepted and valued by others. People often engage in a profession or hobby to gain recognition. These activities give the person a sense of contribution or value. Low self-esteem or an inferiority complex result from imbalances during this level in the hierarchy. People with low self-esteem often need respect from others; they feel the need to seek fame or. However, fame or not help the person to build their self-esteem until they accept who they are internally. Psychological imbalances such as depression can hinder the person from obtaining a higher level of self-esteem or self-respect. Most people have a need for stable self-respect and self-esteem. Maslow noted two versions of esteem needs: a "lower" version and a "higher" version. The "lower" version of esteem is the need for respect from others. This include a need for status, recognition, fame, prestige, and attention. The "higher" version manifests itself as the need for self-respect. For example, the person have a need for strength, competence, mastery, self-confidence, independence, and freedom. This "higher" version takes precedence over the "lower" version because it relies on an inner competence established through experience. Deprivation of these needs lead to an inferiority complex, weakness, and helplessness. looking for a Selma Alabama womenMy LTR started having depression issues the last several months. I tried to get him to seek help, but he blew off my concerns. I saw that he was drinking about a fifth of vodka a week, on top of a sleeping pill at night. He has sleep apnea; that is how this self medication of vodka came to my attention. It's a very risky combination. I asked him to stop, then I pleaded with him to stop. I found free clinics for him to go to, but he would not follow up. He was emotionally volatile, his sleep was horrible, he was always exhausted and on top of everything, he lied to me about his drinking. He finally admitted that he was drinking a fifth or more of vodka a week for about a year, and lied to me about it because he was afraid he would lose me. I remember how confused I was, because when I would talk to him on the phone at night, he was be somewhat slurry and more importantly emotionally up and down. He would post stupid things full of self pity or rudeness, always after 11. But again, denial, so I was intensely confused. Fast forward, I finally broke it off with him two months ago. He has spent the entire time trying to "win" me back, which I really dislike. I asked him not to try to "win" me back, but to take care of himself. Finally he began to admit this problems and started talking to friends besides just me, which is a big load off of my shoulders. Now, he has stopped drinking for about 3 weeks, he is on an anti-depressant for about 10 days. Today he is going to a therapist. Now, he says to me, "I am doing all the right things, let's get back together". I say it's too -; I have lost trust. He gets angry at me when i say i have lost trust and says that if we don't get back together, he lose the spark and for me. I guess I feel that ever since I broke if off with he has been guilting me. I wish I could trust, but damn, it took such a dramatic move on my part to get his attention, I am kind of burned out. So, here is my dilemma. I loved and still this, and wonder if depression caused such a change or not. I want us to work, but I just have to give it time. We are totally platonic right now, because I don't want to give mixed messages and also don't want to mess with my emotions. We have been together 4 years, but 2 of those years was a distance relationship. Any advise would be appreciated. rich mature women
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