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- Awards It's time again for the annual '- Awards'! For those unfamiliar with these awards, they are named after 81-year-old Liebeck who spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued the -'s in New Mexico , where she purchased coffee. You remember, she took the lid off the coffee and put it between her knees while she was driving. Who would ever think one could get burned doing that, right? That' s right; these are awards for the most outlandish lawsuits and verdicts in the. You know, the kinds of cases that make you scratch your head. So keep your head scratcher handy. Here are the Stellas for the past year: * SEVENTH PLACE * Robertson of, Texas was awarded $80, by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The store owners were understandably surprised by the verdict, considering the running toddler was her own. Start scratching! * SIXTH PLACE *, 19, of Los , California won $74, plus medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps. Scratch some more . * FIFTH PLACE * Dickson, of Bristol , Pennsylvania , who was leaving a house he had just burglarized by way of the garage. Unfortunately for Dickson, the automatic garage door opener malfunctioned and he could not get the garage door to open. Worse, he couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the garage to the house locked when Dickson pulled it shut. Forced to sit for eight, count 'em, EIGHT days and survive on a case of Pepsi and a large bag of dry dog food, he sued the homeowner's insurance company claiming undue mental Anguish. Amazingly, the jury said the insurance company must pay Dickson $ , for his anguish. We should all have this kind of anguish. Keep scratching. There are more daddy wants to eat fuck some pussy tonight
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