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w4w forum: posted today I was there about 3 years ago. Similar situation, stable relationship of over a decade, plans for a life together, yada yada yada. (no, tho) I was the one who suddenly looked around and found myself with a huge crush on a cute little goth girl. Couldn't stop thinking about her, didn't want to have sex with the "old Shoe" anymore, wanted the excitement and adventure. So what did I do? I came clean with the wife, told her all about my feelings for this other woman. It hurt her really bad. One of the things she said to me made me realize I was being an idiot. Sex in one's head is much better that sex in real life. In fantasy, arm pits never stink, no one ever blows a big fart during orgasm, the dog never sticks his cold nose up your butt, then whines at the door while you are trying to concentrate. She suggested that I keep the fantasy- masturbate wildly and often, keep the "tease" going with the Goth chick, but never ever "put out." She said, for the sake of our relationship, to try it that way for months, and if I was still all hot and bothered for the gal, she would gracefully pack her shit and leave. Well, the crush lasted for about another month or so, and was it ever fun, but when I started to Goth Chick as the fallible human that she was, I realized how lucky I was I didn't throw away the relationship with my super-genius wife. We are still together, and celebrated our 16th anniversary in. If you let your gal "take her space" you be communicating that the relationship is not all that important to you. You need to let her know how devastated you are going to be, and that she is going to have one hell of a fight on her hands when it comes to breaking up. don't make it easy for her. I thank my woman every day that she was strong, and that I was worth it to her to fight back emotionally. cheated husband looking for some payback- for example sends out huge bulbous root systems which wrap themselves right around ohias and hapu'us and choke them out. The is lovely when in bloom, but a "little" goes a way. The hapu'u are tree ferns that grow to be 30 feet and taller. Their huge fronds come out new every and the old fronds turn brown and fall. Left untended, each hapu'u has a look like an umbrella that's been through several storms. The hanging down fronds lie on the ground and decompose and the stems they were on are like so broken umbrella sticks poking out and down all around the plant. So, hacking away at the jungle means removing the as-weeds and the dead and dying fronds, as well as yanking out the vines that likewise grow up and over everything if left alone. There are native and introduced orchids and anthuriums that grow wild and come out and be understory in the rain if it is cleared, and beautiful moss covers the cleared grounds and ohia trunks. TMI? sex woman
Hood River bitches fucking I of course was also not guilt free in my relationship, nobody ever is, and I've also had some issues with insecurity. I think there's a big difference though in recognizing and resolving your own faults/defects, which is important, and using them to excuse someone -'s faults/defects. My ex would pull the same thing too with the "think what you want, that's what you're going to do anyway". Simple deflection. Insecurity is definitely an issue that needs to be dealt with. I'm just scratching the surface myself on how to deal with it and fix it so that I don't repeat my mistakes. But the point is, a liar is a liar, no matter how big or small the lies and no matter what the reasons behind them. The difference between someone with insecurities vs someone without insecurities being in a relationship with a liar though, is that the person without insecurities won't stick around and put up with being lied to for very. Of course you're going to second guess everything he says, because he's given you every reason to do that. Just be glad you're taking care of this now instead of going as far as I did. Because after 10 years together (6 years married), I've spent the last few months wondering if his was one big lie (even though I know on some level deep down he DID and care about me). Good on you for that. in there. It'll be easier to focus on yourself once you no longer have to think about what you or not have been lied to about. older horney in Zhongzao
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