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get a couple of books such as "Screw the Roses Give Me the Thorns" and "SM ". These give great insight to the questions you are asking. In my humble opinion they are much like the bible to the BD/SM sub/dom culture. Savannah swingers clubwrote. Like you said "I know that each and everyday I am not going to be like that" Look I don't think either of you is the antichrist here but allow me to be the blunt asshole that I am. You guys decided to have 4 friggin' together, you stay at home and he works providing for the home. With all that energy devoted to holding that together..somehow inbetween you think there should be some sort of fantasy life. Get real. I mean that, get REAL. Look around you and what do you? As things are, not how they should be, how they are. Are your well cared for and loved? Is where you live a home? Is what you've created around you something you are proud of? What does it take to make it that way? How much investment has to be made? Investment in time, money and energy? After that, how much is left? I'm going to tell you something that you'll come to realize if you decide to let this slide further and the end result is divorce. Now picture that alone and you know what? You'll FIND the energy and most likely you'll find the energy to put into someone new. After a shitload of pain. You'll do it because you'll HAVE to in order to get what you want. And if you're really good about it, you'll look back at this time in your life and realize you had the ability all along. You know, the old saying, if I only knew THEN.. You'll realize just how powerful you really are and how weak you once were. How much choice you had, how much opportunity was there you didn't take. Like chosing to be "crabby" because that's your right. It IS your right and that's how you've decided to handle shit like that. So the consequences of that are YOURS. That's YOUR shit. So go ahead and pull the "I'm unhappy" card or fix it. Is this fun shit you want to do going to fall from the sky? This is a little too big to decifer and fix in a few posts..they have counselors for just that reason, books and internet articles, the list goes on. But you gotta DO something about it. You lazy twits, you'll get to figure all this out when you HAVE to. You should do it now because what your asking for..you already can have. dating agency
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