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I'm really asking for advice. I know what I did was wrong but our brains do shit to "trick" us all of our brains, not just mine. The person has a way a justifying they aren't just bad or a home wrecker. They tell themselves "well they are really unhappy" whatever. It was really hard for me because the sex stuff only lasted less than a month. There were so ways that we connected although now I'm wondering if that is even true. I didn't just try to ruin this dudes marriage. I told him numerous times to stop contacting me. I also constantly date other people in the hopes of finding another romantic distraction. It has been hard to let go. But, again, I think situations like mine are more common than people want to let on..otherwise there wouldn't be a 50% divorce rate and so men (and women out to cheat). That's a distinction, This person was out to cheat, I was just stupid, not maniacal. I do not believe in "homwreckers" only you can ruin your marriage. The way I look at it is that I was the enabler, he was the. People here think I'm a cad a slut. Well, I am a slut actually. I didn't have an orgasm and felt sexually disempowered until I was well over 40 so yea, I am a bit slutty because I found an empowerment I never had before (although I'm kind of like a nun slut because I've had sex twice (literally this year. But I'm actually a very nice person. It's my empathy (in a twisted way) that got me into this bad situation in the first place. Pryor Creek bear in your engaged im marriedyour so right. i feel it sometimes, the dark, sad, self pittying feelings; its right there. if i want too i can sit in it. wallow in it. i even like it. the funny thing is, I have everything to be grateful for. so much good inside and outside of me. i'm succesful too. an asset to society. i've got music, job, shelter, a bed, work, i can read, write, i've got good health, thats just for today. Not bad not bad at all. oooh and a great collection of Comic Books!! yummy i want so much more, i'm grabing all all the good. but, i am also grateful for the here and now. i'm happy, have peace, and serenity., and a date tonight. without money or matieral (sp), i've got it all!!! its important for me to stay busy, this time of year, and rest eat good, sleep good, drink water, enjoy life!! free online sex
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