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DH needs a reality check. Either you're on the same with co-parenting, or this thing isn't gonna work out over the haul. No, his aren't little demons, but they're not little angels, either. Good parents step up to the plate and take their to task when they misbehave. It's time to level the playing field. You're their stepmother, not their BBsitter. They're welcome in your home, but like all homes, there are rules. You have every right to set them and enforce them. Keep in mind that when boys get into late adolescence, it's not unusual for them to crave more time with their Dads. With the family dynamics in your household, that urge only become stronger. I can promise you that if he packs up his things and leaves, just to get away from all the BS, you never look at DH the same again. Tell him that. When you negotiate this thing, make sure he realizes that if you not allow your to feel squeezed out. He is a member of the household. DH needs to respect that, and *model* that respect to his. Tell that of yours that if he doesn't take this matter seriously, your resentment build to the point that the marriage fail. And you don't intend to around and watch it play out. attractive shy man looking to explorestillReminds me of my mom when she can't control me or my siblings. Perhaps she behave like my mother does and feel horrible later when your hubby returns. Anyways like have posted it is really his job to settle this. Since he isn't here all you can really do is try to communicate with her in a way that strokes her ego. I know its sad but you can't reason with a crazy or irrational person. Maybe tell her you do need the car for the (shopping etc) and to stop by her place to her granddaughter. If that doesn't help just deal with the step dad and hopefully he won't let her interfere. Personally I wouldn't even bring my around that kind of dysfunctional person. I know you want her to be in your -'s life and are being kind but think about if this stress is worth it to you now since you have so much on your plate already. Good luck. japan girl
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