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You're taking a single concept/action (paying your bills) without breaking it down into its most basic pieces. You can't truly understand what a rock is, and what unique qualities it has unless you know its exact composition. For all intents and purposes for most people, a rock is a rock and that's all fine and dandy, but not acknowledging the differences between two rocks doesn't make them the same. It's a lot harder to with more complex actions and situations as there are so component pieces to consider, but I'll try with your example. Paying your bills: Primarily Submissive: Giving up something you want to have (money), more specifiy the willingness to do so (paying one's bills) Primarily Dominant: Choosing an action (paying one's bills), knowingly, that bring either positive results or avoiding negative repercussions Expanding upon the dominant portion Self interest (dominant): Doing something because it brings positive results (sense of accomplishment, "doing one's duty" or what one is "supposed to do" or "repaying a debt"), or avoids negative results (having to pay more further down the line, garnished wages) married guy giving head1) Lets start with sic "holding tight to your morals and values". Sounds damned sanctimonious to me. I'm not sure what your morals and values are, but what makes you think that are any better than someone -'s? Or do you think you have a monopoly? So, first off, I would suggest that you be a bit more tolerant of others. You might find that their morals and values are just as good as yours. Indeed, they might turn their back on you because they are holding tight to theirs . 2) Then there's "I don't want to be involved with the crowd." Psssssst: You're. That doesn't mean you have to spend your life in bars, drinking, or doing. But if you turn up your nose at everyone, you're not likely to find someone to be with. people go to bars JUST to socialize. You should try it socializing, that is. You don't have to go to bed with everyone you meet, but you could at least share something OTHER THAN your morals and values. And, as people have pointed out, there are other venues, even in Rochester. Start ing. 3) Stop hiding. OK, you're gonna say you're not hiding and you're just straight acting so everyone assumes you are straight. It helps that you disdain the "- crowd", of course. You say you get attention from unattractive, flamboyant guys. Maybe you should rethink your marketing plan. No one would have bought a pet rock without the right advertising. Since you don't go to places where men congregate, it means you expect them to find you. You'd better make yourself known, then. 4) The average guy doesn't want to waste his time with someone who uses his superior morals and values as an excuse for being frigid and in the closet. That leaves the desperate ones. Replace your cross with a pink triangle, and you might have better luck. just looking for sex
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