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i need help understanding what just happened with a new guy. we had been dating and getting along well and finally became intimate. the problem seems to be our relative sexual experience. i'm 22; he's 24. we hadn't talked about each other's priors but i'm sure i'm only the second or third girl he's slept with. as for me let's just say i've have a lot of guys, including a number of casual, immature, irresponsible hookups that i'm not proud of. i really like this one and he makes me comfortable in a way i usually haven't felt when i'm going with a guy. he's actually more mature emotionally than any of the guys i've dated and he's smart, good tempered, witty, and we really enjoy each other's company. we have conversations. after we started having sex regularly, one night i took the initiative and, without being too graphic, did something that i thought would be really nice for him and took my time and everything. i really got into it. at the time he seemed to like it and we had a great night. when we next got together there was something wrong and he eventually explained with discomfort and embarrassment on his part that what i had done and the way i had done it made it obvious that i had done it before with other guys. he couldn't help thinking of how guys i've been with. he doesn't i repeat does not want the details from me but he's somehow bothered by the disparity in our relative sexual histories. he's smart enough to realize that it's his reaction that is bothering him, not the fact that all that happened. but he's really mixed up and conflicted and tho he admits it is his issue, he can't seem to get beyond it. i think he's worried that he won't measure up to old lovers, which is ironic because a lot of the guys i was with before him were really lousy lays and he's actually great in the sack: patient, enthusiastic, loving—if anything he shows me how much experience does not matter at all. help! i don't want to lose him (at least over something like this). this has real potential. sex contacts Midland
I'm not one of those people that usually has to come out to others it's kind of obvious. And when I lived in a smaller town, I almost got beat up twice by queer baiters each time it was at least 4 or 5 strapping men who appeared to be both drunk and angry. But I talked my way out of it each time. This was during the heyday of the OCA the vilest and most persistent homophobic political group in the state. My straight upstairs neighbor, bless her, had put a lawn sign on our lawn that was against the OCA's latest ballot measure. I was coming home from work one day, and saw someone in my front yard, kicking over the sign. I got out of my car and said "Hey!" and she took off running, shouting Bible verses over her shoulder, capping her tirade with "Stay out of our schools, queer!" The scary thing is, I did work at a local community college at the time. Not sure how she knew that. I'd never seen her before. Another time during that, I'd been interviewed by a local paper, and I think the article was about the OCA, which I was clearly against. They used my name and where I worked (I was a busser at a mini-mall, my other job) but there was no picture of me. Anyway, a day or so later, I was walking my dog at 5am, and two women were out jogging in the park going the opposite direction. As they passed me, one of them said quietly "I saw you in the paper" in a way that was clearly menacing. It was double-plus-ungood. divorcee ladies SterrettMrs Pooxxx is FUCKING. AWESOME. She's motivated. Intense. Witty. Energetic. Hilarious. And, best of all, there is not a bone of spite in her body. Sure, she'll express the wrong feeling or express it the wrong way, but she doesn't sit on things, term grudges that stink up the joint. She doesn't silently stew. She doesn't operate in a dualistic world of ulterior motives. She's quite explicit and very non-manipulative. And, she's the most beautiful woman I have ever known, but that's just bonus. Every day with her is a challenge to be at the top of my game, and it's hard. It's hard to be married to someone who has so much of their shit together. The temptation is soooooo great to point out the very big flaws (and sure, she has them, as do we all) and keep pointing them out until I feel better. When that doesn't work, the temptation is equally great to make the relationship about making her happy until I don't have any time or energy to even think about myself, and then to turn that on her and accuse her of neglect. I've played all those games, but what the fuck kind of is that? I hate to say it, but I've looked at other women. I've seriously considered other women. It's nice to know they're there, but in all honesty, they don't measure up to Mrs Pooxxx my. match personals
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