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I just read a recent article that cited statistics saying most term marriages are like yours indifferent, confused, or somewhat dissatisfied. I'm not married. But I think sometimes we forget the for the trees. If your is fundamentally a good person (is kind and tries to do the right thing) and has at least a few attractive qualities you've still got a good. The rest is up to you. Your happiness in your own life, and to a large extent in your marriage, is what you make of it. Most people maintain a consistent level of happiness (or unhappiness) throughout their lives. Even after life changes (like marriage), after a while, they revert back to normal levels of happiness, whatever normal ever was for them. My advice to you is to be courageous and generous with your. Extend yourself and open your affections toward him repeatedly, regularly first. Even if he doesn't first. He surely at some point reciprocate at least a little. Praise that little a LOT. The positive reinforcement make him feel good and make him want to please you more. you'll be back on track. Take responsibility for making your marriage awesome, rather than dwelling on what you're "entitled" to. Something to consider/try, anyway. El monte looking for tonight tomorrow
The narcissist lacks empathy. Consequently, he is not really interested in the lives, emotions, needs, preferences, and hopes of people around him. Even his nearest and dearest are, to him, mere instruments of gratification. They require his undivided attention only when they "malfunction" when they become disobedient, independent, or critical. He loses all interest in them if they cannot be "fixed" (for instance, when they are terminally ill). People find the narcissist "cold", "inhuman", "heartless", "clueless", "robotic or machine-like". Early on in life, the narcissist learns to disguise his socially-unacceptable indifference as benevolence, equanimity, cool-headedness, composure, or superiority. "It is not that I don't care about others" he shrugs off his critics "I am simply more level-headed, more resilient, more composed under pressure They mistake my equanimity for apathy." The narcissist tries to convince people that he is compassionate. His profound lack of interest in his spouse's life, vocation, interests, hobbies, and whereabouts he cloaks as benevolent altruism. "I give her all the freedom she can wish for!" he protests "I don't spy on her, follow her, or nag her with endless questions. I don't bother her. I let her lead her life the way she sees fit and don't interfere in her affairs!". He makes a virtue out of his emotional truancy. All very commendable but when taken to extremes such benign neglect turns malignant and signifies the voidance of true and attachment. The narcissist's emotional (and, often, physical) absence from all his relationships is a form of aggression and a defense against his own thoroughly repressed feelings. In rare moments of self-awareness, the narcissist realizes that without his input even in the form of feigned emotions people abandon him. He then swings from cruel aloofness to maudlin and grandiose gestures intended to demonstrate the "larger than life" nature of his sentiments. This bizarre pendulum only proves the narcissist's inadequacy at maintaining adult relationships. It convinces no one and repels. naughty women Warrenbut one of the facts of this community, if you want to it that, is the level of isolation, the degree of closetedness. By the way, I respect you for being out, for being willing to tell friends of your bisexuality. Have you considered starting a social group for bi's. Bisexuality sets off alarms in a lot of people, I suspect because it challenges them to consider that sexuality is not as fixed as they would like it to be, especially their own sexuality! As a, I have met a lot of men who have accepted that I am bi, and had sex with me, and a few, meeting them socially, totally rejected bisexuality. If you survey the posts in the m4m, at least in the urban areas I'm most familiar with, San and New York, there is a huge percentage of men ing themselves bi and a large number claiming to be straight while having sex with men, so they as well be bi. Although I have responded to a few in my age group, or who might have other interests to share other than just sex, most are unwilling to think deeply about the fact that they are bisexual. It seems as if they are really afraid of understanding themselves. Lastly, my experience has been that most admitted bisexual women are primarily looking for another women to share with, not a -! Twice, I have had women who were attracted to me, tell me that they were bisexual, but when I revealed that I also was bisexual, they ran away as fast as possible! Go figure! black teen
in town tonight only lady wanted the prospective boss asks, "So, your resume shows that you've been consulting how have you been supporting yourself?" We know that that is NOT relevant. Anyone can ask you anything in an interview whether it is appropriate or not. We choose if we want to answer directly or not. Some people don't recognize others who have been struggling in this economy. The boss who drives his car up the parking car garage, valet parks his car, takes the elevator up to his office, while remaining somewhat immune to what's really going on. I get that occasionally during interviews, "So, what have you been doing the past couple of years?" ("consulting, volunteering, or taking care of an elderly relative" apparently don't explain enough). This guy actually wanted to know "HOW I've been taking care of myself financially." I applied to my related field of career. It IS entry level because that is all that is available right now. 10 yrs ago, I made $2k more than what this job is offering. Right now, I'm not making anything. He said, "I'm afraid you'll want to leave in 3, 6, or 9 mos." IF a prospective boss finds a single educated woman with. degree and prior related work experience willing to start at the bottom, what can HE do to retain me in 1-yr or 2 yrs from now? Help me understand where HE is coming from and how best to dialogue with him. Because right now, ppl are operating out of FEAR mode. They don't know what to do with mid-age, over educated, out of work job seekers who WANT to help them make money and do well and get back to work. He said, "Starting pay is $ " Starting pay, yet he said while looking at my resume, "You're extremely overqualified, I just don't know if you'll stick around." I know the pay RANGE, could I ask for a teeny bit more IF he offers it? Starting pay doesn't pay much, that's why. Raises are based on what your starting pay is. So are promotions. a real fwb woman
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