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It's gonna hurt a while. No way around it. I strongly suggest seeing an individual therapist for support during this time. Everyone's telling you to leave your husband IMO once you've digested the worst of the shock, you'll know what to do. I have a hard time believing this was a one-time lapse of judgement on your husband's part. I can't help but think some of the ex's craziness is related to factors you don't know. Not that I blame you for hating the ex and holding her responsible for this disaster. That's a natural first reaction. But at some point, I think you'll realize she have been as victimized by your husband as you and his have been. At some point, I think you'll realize BOTH the ex and your husband are deeply disturbed. Normal women don't lose custody of their -; normal men don't even consider sleeping with a batshit crazy ex. Do all you can to protect your sanity. Get all the support you can. Somehow people manage to get through even worse situations and go on to have sane and happy lives; so, as much as it hurts, remember this too pass. I'm sorry this happened to you. looking for a good time 28
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