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I was remembering this time years ago when I stayed up for days (boy was I a coffee addict!) with the guitar player for Boom and the Legion of Doom. I have no idea what we talked about because, like of my friends in those days, he was completely unintelligible and slobbery most of the time. But to commemorate our time together, gave me a photograph. It seems that when he used to go visit his grandma in Louisiana, he spent blissful days in the swamp harpooning frogs. At the end of each day, he would bring the frog carcasses home and mash them into a ball that he kept in Grandma's freezer. Each day the ball grew larger. Finally, it grew too big for the freezer, and his grandma requested that he dispose of the thing. Alas, he hated to part with his treasure! He complied, but not before taking a photograph of what was probably the world's largest frozen frog carcass ball. This was the photograph he gifted me with on that night, EVEN THOUGH I wouldn't have sex with him (he was a good, if somewhat damaged, and knew the lyrics to every Dead Boys too). At the time of the gifting, I don't think I truly appreciated the. I kept it for a year or two, but, after I stopped drinking MASSIVE amounts of coffee, it only served to remind me of the bad old days, and so I threw it away (!!!). Anyway, I'm only telling you this story because, upon reading your post, I had the urge to post a of a giant ball of frozen frog carcasses. O Woe Dover european women for a friendThis hit you the hardest because you bought into the whirlwind romance idea. You might have vocalized a more pragmatic stance with him but your emotions were pouncing on the promise that it could be true. Understandable. This hit you hardest than the other relationships because you're in your 30's now. You're ready for serious. You WANT serious. Understandable. All your emotions are understandable but illogical. You have posted that you pointed out the logic of the situation to him times. However, your emotions REALLY wanted to believe and now it's over. You're lucky. REALLY lucky. Imagine being married when he pulled the rug out from under you like that. Imagine having with him when he decided he was "out of now". That would be a whole lot worse. It hurts and I'm sorry but only two months with a guy like that makes you lucky. There. I said it again. Now, you need to tell yourself how lucky you are. Over and over again until you start believing it. You mentioned anger. Sure, I'd be super pissed. However, again, looking at the bigger picture you got out cheap. Vent, journal, cry, eat ice cream, some air guitar, etc. When you're ready make the decision to move on. It won't help to know why he did it. It's his nature and now he's gone. If he comes back? You don't deserve that and after healing you wouldn't WANT that. Let that idea go too. I'm sorry. I you heal from this. married female looking
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