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You say you don't judge people? Well, it's about time you started using some judgement in trying to determine what you can and cannot fix. An immature drunk whose idea of discussing differences is to run away? Just where do you this relationship going? He's not going to change he sounds stubborn as hell and not terribly bright. (I mean, all that drama over a damn seat belt? It's probably the law in your state to wear the seat belt in the first place why argue with you over it?) I think it's time for a "come to -" meeting, where you tell him, calmly, that he needs to learn how to air differences in an adult manner, because the next time he walks, the door locks are being changed and he can come back the next day to pick up his stuff which be neatly boxed on the front porch. This walking out on an argument is the height of manipulative crap. If he seems in the least bit willing, consider couples counseling to learn how to disagree effectively. But honestly given all the problems here, why would you want to go to all that trouble? It's not "judging" someone to realize that hey, this isn't how you want to spend the rest of your life or even the next month of your life. mature Oldham South Dakota forum
going thru a very tough time, just need to vent/get things off my chest. i've reached bottom. my husband i've been going thru a rough time 4 the last yr. (been together for almost 16yr/married for 18 mos. known each other since we were 15). we tried talking/working it out. been thru it all together. i've tried to be on his it thru his eyes. i my hub w/all my heartsoul, so affection/-, encouragement/praise were easily shown by me. i always felt so at least. he begs to differ. i cooked, cleaned, laundry, take care of our, yardwork, run errands for him, literally serve him food/drink when asked. he claims differently; "i wasn't there 4him. i was mean/horrible person" i'd ask him 2 help out w/our daughter (dr appt, lunches, make sure she got asthma meds)4example. ask him 2spend time w/us insted of being on the comp for 15 hrs/day on his off days, go w/us 2 fam functions. when i'd ask ask, nothing wld happn i'd get mad (is that wrong? 2expect help? a lil fam time f/my husband?) so i'd say "WTF?! can i get a lil damn help? can you spend a lil time w/us" he'd get mad, arguments would ensue, we'd end up saying mean things 2 each other that caused a lot of hurt (bitch,horrible wife,shitty person. i'd say similar things too; "lazy, get off your ass, take a lil interest on our kid). there were also times we'd be in each others face arguing, he shove me away, i'd end up doing the same. so yea, we'd put hands on each other. i'd walk 2 another room, he'd follow, vice versa. never felt like he would take initiative. so i guess my asking, became nagging, which turned into bitchiness b/c i was tired of feeling overwhelmed him not doing anything (or so i felt like). so i guess my hub basiy came 2 dis-like me, say i'm a mean/horrible woman, i harass him continually, that i've him, squashed his feelings, kept him f/being a dad now he's finished w/our marriage. i've driven him 2 feel this way about me. "single handedly ruined our lives, i've told u what u cld do to fix this, u just don't give a shit". he's "sailing his own boat w/o my mean abusive ass". i'm having a really hard time dealing. 2wks ago he was saying he loves me, happy abt our due in 6wks, loves our family. now he wants no part in it. "i'll be there 4 my. but u, i don't give a shit about". that hurts so much. my hearts breaking Am i wrong? just looking to talk or make a new friendIf you’re uncomfortable with behavior don’t deal with him. If he says that’s the way this is take his word at face value. There are plenty of people like this. When I was a kid my dad tried to run a passing car off the road because my mom mentioned the woman in the passenger seat “gave her a dirty look”. He’d also scream at the top of his lungs anywhere for no good reason, at restaurants, hotel lobbies, weddings, gas stations, at people on the street. I also know an attorney and judge like this. I avoid him as much as possible. The shit he gets away with is amazing. horney matches
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