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ca65 single fun surfer musician guy seeking fun roommate on the coastYour hurting so bad and I know because I was in almost the same situation a little over a year ago. Everything is not lost. You get through all this. Surround youself with happy people and stay awy from the downer people who to talk about problems. Decide to be happy and you get there. I not be as smart sounding as some of the other posts but this was kind of my life to so I’ll tell you about that. I got married and we were so much in that we did everything together. Maybe that was overkill or something because at some point I either got lazy or bored but I stopped thinking for myself and just expected him to make me happy. Like the other person said, that’s a big burden to put on somebody. I think maybe he started to resent me for not giving my share in the relationship and I got mad when I realized that it wasn’t that perfect marriage anymore but instead of us trying to figure out what happened we just grew apart which was really realy sad because we had so much going for us. I met a guy through a friend who listened to me when I was just in that sad place. I let him take over my thinking and he convinced me that he could make me happy. That’s where I screwed up thinking that another person had to make me happy. What I know now is that I have to make me happy. Anyway I left my husband who didn’t know what happened. He knew we weren’t as close as we had been but he was bad hurt when I left and I was mad enough to not care. There was some things about the new guy that didn’t quite seem right but I was so excited to be back into a relationship that I didn’t alot of things that people were telling me I guess I was stubborn or blind but I got mad at allot of people who were trying to make me stuff about him. He ended up just being crazy about me til he had me and then the challenge was gone. He was playing other people at the same time I was throwing my life awy cause I believed him. You say your husband keeps ing you. I say your so lucky. I dont’ know how my husband still wanted me but he did. I went back to him with a whole new beginning. i started to really appreciate how much we did have and didn’t take it all for granted. The big excitement with the new guy was just a temporary thrill that wasn’t deep like the memories I had with my husband. Maybe I didn’t know that then but I it clear now. Ne fat girl
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On the other hand, if it's "just sex" and you are in a relationship where fidelity is expected and has been promised then what's the big deal? If it IS "just sex", then why is it so important to get some nooky outside of your relationship? "Just sex" is a STUPID reason because it is never "just" anything. It's part of a thrill of getting away with something, it's wondering how much greener the grass is on that fence, it's needing to feel desired by someone (and thus reinforcing your own shaky ego), and it's an infantile way of saying, "You're not the boss of me!" And, as sphynx noted, it's not just you you are opening BOTH partners to a a world of STDs, unwanted pregnancies, relationship issues, etc. No one forces you into a committed relationship. YOU'RE the one that made the promises. And you are the only one that breaks them. If you're a guy, you weren't just walking down the street with your pecker hanging out and accidently tripped and fell into a vagina. And if you're a woman, you didn't just suddenly wake up and realize you're lying down on a bed with your heels in the air with some dude doing pushups on your chest. It's NEVER "accidental" it's the result of a decision to cheat. And THAT is a betrayal of trust that is very hard to get past. hoping to make some new friends
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