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I keep saying how the bars in oklahoma are stupid. Although really there are a couple which are not so bad. Both of them have heteros in the mix, and that takes the edge off of the all-guy heavy cruising factor. However the guys that get my attention, when I go talk to them, they are always straight. There is a shopping-mall which has a really high percentage of guys working there. I have thought to go in there and do the cruising-walk. In the past I have had guys tell me that they can tell what I am up to just from the way I am walking. In the mall, if you watch me, it is obvious that I am not shopping. One afternoon at the mall was a in an airforce flight suit, zip up front. He was a real deal AF guy. I had to talk to him. He was really cool, he laughed and did smile at me and said he appreciated the offer but said he was straight. I also out in hardware stores and bookstores, just because there are good looking guys in there. again so far no luck. ft Greater hobart hookers"The fact he is coming out is not bad.. it was just upsetting that his wife was totally unaware of it." Not to trivialize the situation, but that line strongly suggests that her reaction is mainly a response to a surprise. Even the nastiest surprise stops being surprising after a while; or to put in in other words, if she gives herself time, she'll get over her upset. For closeted men, it takes a lot of backbone to come out, so the husband's inability to confront the simple truth that he's queer, a dirty fag, a nasty fudgepacker, and he's going to break out in a pink feather boa any minute that inability is entirely understandable. Of course, as out men we know that none of those pejorative remarks are valid (except possibly the pink feather boa part), but it takes time to realize that being queer isn't the same as being some kind of subhuman. From where I sit, the most serious aspect of the situation looks to be the husband's drinking problem. If he asked me for my advice, I'll tell him to smell the coffee, admit he's queer (in some sense or other, whatever floats his boat), stop the drinking and dramatizing, realize he's acting out all the lies he's been told about gays, straighten up his back, and confront the future with a smile on his lips. "Acting out all the lies he's been told about gays." IOW, he's giving power to the people who promulgate those lies; is that what he wants, to let those cocksuckers control the way he leads his life? A better reaction is cold rage at being lied to. swinger clubs
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