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I found out from my vociferously ignorant neighbor that Deirdre has a new boyfriend. There was that initial feeling being replaced, of being bettered, of not being good enough, of wanting to lash out, of wanting to sulk in, I tried to rationalize it, mindspeaking that she will break up with him, that he's probably not as good as me, in this way or that. Perhaps I could swash this fly of a man. How dare..
That is all so pathetic. Those acid malice fulled emotions. I would like to say, being such an awesome charlie sheen of a man, that I pushed those negative selfish emotions away and they never came back. They come back. I get angry and thin, as if someone is holding my emotions up against the wall, as if my emotional well is being run dry, as if she broke my loving.
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Well, clearly were offended. None of the posts were free of attack other than that from VeganWoman. So to VeganWoman.. thanks for having an open mind about my post. It was very late at night, I was in a very bleh mood, have no idea why I posted it.. guess I was hoping for a few people would feel the same way as I do and could relate and then I guess in some way I would not feel so alone and would feel hopeful. Clearly that didn't work out, lol. That's what you get for making impulsive communications at 4 in the morning. In general regarding my 'high standards', I don't feel my standards are so high because I want to date a woman who has at least a bachelors degree, is generally attractive, isn't a cheater, isn't sloppy, is classy, has feminine qualities that I find attractive and yet is more of a leader in a relationship. That's just it. Now in my opinion, having ridiculous standards would be to say something like I want to date only women who wear designer clothes, make at least X amount of money, have blonde hair, are at least x height, have legs, or whatever. More than likely it's the way I phrased my posting that made it sound like I had these ridiculous expectations, which I really don't think I do. But then again, I suppose time tell. I don't out at bars I've been to Steel Blue once. So whoever took that away from my message misread who I am. And I am, believe it or not, not a superficial person compared to the average woman. Anyway, there's no reason for me to defend myself or explain myself because I'm certain that no matter what I say at this point it's not going to change how people perceive where I am coming from. So, I'll just chalk this up to a silly late night whim that ended up in being misunderstood by a group of strangers. I meant no offense to anyone. I myself enjoy women so I was not criticizing and I do appreciate people for who they are on the inside I also feel that certain ways in which a person conducts their lives and presents themselves on the outside communicates certain things about the person on the inside. I want to be swept away in, don't we all? I just happen to have personal feelings on what kinds of characteristics I need in a woman in order to fall in. Maybe that change, maybe it won't. Troutdale Oregon women looking for phone sex- is in the house that X put into foreclosure we wondered why she kept asking where do you think you are going to live when all of this is over You she ed the mortgage company and told them she was going through a divorce and that the mortgage was not going to be paid and changed the mailing address to the law firm she works for so did not know all the payments he was sending were not being processed until he went to pay one in person and the said we can take this payment your house is in foreclosure of which all payments were returned to him and he had to pay all kinds of fees to save the home He is working to build his company back up after she ed of his clients and told them all kinds of lies about the company He has his every other weekend for now and sees that they get to have their friends over to play since none of the parents allow their to go to the mother's except for one parent. He loves them and takes care of them and WE meaning all of our family tries to explain away all the mean things that mommy does as not to worry about..things get better..And NO HE IS NOT PERFECT..AND YES HE FOUGHT WITH HIS X ALL OF THE TIME And guess who dear sweet daughter in-law complained to all of the time about everything in her life even down to having to spend some of her pay check to buy school clothes for her and pay for groceries when the company she helped destroy started to go down hill was not making BIG BUCKS to support her shopping habit of which her paycheck was used for all the years I the good and the bad in both of them and at this point in her life hers is mostly BAD .and only she can fix that His he still has lots of things he is dealing with and continue to deal with mostly trying to save a company that I am not sure he can save The personal things that he needs to work on well time tell if he can what are they he took after me..he believes right is right and wrong is wrong..and has not gotten old enough yet to realize that unless it affects you directly Stay out of it and let the chips for other fall where they unless they invite you int . bbw singles
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