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to 'get over' HIS trust issues. If he even has them. He lied to you. This is as plain as the nose on your face, and I think you know that. Who cares whether he likes this girl or not, sending of this type to another woman, while in an exclusive relationship, is so clearly wrong. And he knows this. Thing is, though, you caught him red-handed. His last resort (and a total grasping at straws move, I might add) is to bring into the equation his trust issues, real or imagined, and make the problem about your going through his phone. When the problem is his weirdo exchanges with another woman. Now, of course you shouldn't have gone through his phone. Some problems with trust/ doubts about his fidelity, that you undoubtedly have, brought you there. The questions I think you have to ask yourself is, do YOU have trust issues (in general); OR, has he shown you in some way, in the recent or distant past, that he is not a trustworthy person? If you have trust issues in general, you should work those out as best you can (preferably with help) before venturing into a serious relationship. On the other hand, if he is simply not a trustworthy person, you need to ask yourself why you've stayed on this. be a codependency issue there. My own sinking suspicion is that he's a bit manipulative and has done/ said things before that shook your trust a bit. Even if it's just small things; little white lies accumulate. But I don't really know. If I were you, I'd take the no tolerance route and just break up with him on the basis of the and think about all this in more depth after having done that. xxx Harlow womenTry not to cry. Try not to let it erupt into an argument or a bargaining situation. But he does need to know how you feel. Try your best to express what it is about the relationship that has you feeling uneasy; specific instances, perceived assumptions, expectations, etc. (don't fall back on your age as the only 'reason' think about the relationship). Maybe tell him you're thinking that this relationship shouldn't automatiy be presumed to result in post-graduation marriage. Maybe you want to move for your new job alone, etc. you should voice these things. You never really know what he'll say, but you have nothing to lose by laying it all out (with some serious forethought) to him. Maybe all you both need is a recalibration of expectations. Or, maybe something more drastic is needed, but you won't know until you talk about how you're feeling and think first about why you're feeling this way (outside your age). And one way or another, you need to get a job., regardless; at least a temporary one until your post-graduation early career job. I really can't get on board with the idea of being supported % by someone while you're in school. You set yourself up in doing so and it rarely turns out well. adult personals online
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