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You found out years ago, and you said he "had" a sex addiction. Did he get treatment for the sex addiction? How had it happened before you found out? Has he been faithful since? Have you both sought help from a counselor to get past this? lonely woman PaghamI agree with you that a client fantasizing about a therapist isn't a horrible thing. It's when those fantasies get in the way of performing the work for which the therapist is tasked to performed that it crosses from the gray into the black. In the case of massage therapists, there's a physical intimacy that can lead itself into sexual inappropriateness. From my perspective, it would likely be helpful to let an MT know that you tend to have intense, erotic reactions to being massaged if that's truly the case. If the MT consents to providing treatment or services after knowing such things, then it seems OK in my book, especially given the training provided about potential sexual responses to massage. I've not had a response to massage of the same quality as the one the OP describes, so I'm not clear what it would entail. However, I also think it's silly to assume that clients of professionals don't fantasize about those professionals, just as it's silly to assume that any person's thoughts of us are pure and chaste. Who knows when we be wank fodder for someone? As as the wank fodder doesn't inhibit the professional conduct of a relationship, I don't an ultimate problem with it, as that would require the exercise of self-control. On the other extreme are psychotherapists, who delve deeply into their clients' psyches. Often times, the emotional intimacy that's created can lead to sexual fantasies. In that case, however, there's not direct manipulation of the body, so having sexual responses during the session isn't expected or appropriate. Nevertheless, therapists are often fodder for clients' masturbatory fantasies. In and of itself, is that wrong? No. Could it be problematic? Absolutely, especially if the fantasies become more important than the therapeutic work that's to be done. At that point, such intense fantasies would have to be discussed and worked through, with the client accepting a transfer to another therapist if there can't be any resolution of the fantasies. beach nude
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