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the Butch-Femme Society's monthly meeting about 3 months ago (acutally it was 3 months and "part B" was 2 months ago, but I missed "part B" I'm still kicking myself.) Of course the answer is very individual and not objective at all, but here's my "readers' digest" answer. No non-sense (which does not mean lack of a sense of humor), not-forced, not-trying-to-hard-affectation, real, comfortable with who she is without obviously over-analyzing herself. Confident. Someone who takes care of herself in the broad, term sense of the phrase. (I beleive we take care of what we value.) In other words, not only showers regularly, and dresses in clean clothes, but also eats well, exercises, doesn't smoke, knows how and when to relax and has a sense of priorities "don't sweat the small stuff." And I can occasionaly the female side of her through the butch. The feminine voice, maybe smallish hands, a penchent for chit-chat something "girlish" just under the surface of all that butchness. Other than that, I haven't really spent any time at all thinking about it much ;) want to talk to a female discretely
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