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Men's Pearls of Wisdom 1. When I was born, I was given a choice a big or a good memory. I don't remember which I chose. 2. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. 3. A wife is a sex. Every time you ask for sex, she objects. 4. Impotence: Nature's way of saying 'No hard feelings ' 5. There are only two letter words that are offensive to men 'don't' and 'stop', unless they are used together. 6. Panties: Not the best thing on earth, but next to the best thing on earth. 7. There are stages of sex in a -'s life: Tri Weekly, Try Weekly, and Try Weakly. 8. Virginity can be cured. 9. Virginity is not dignity, it's lack of opportunity. 10. Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand. 11. I tried phone sex once, but the holes in the dialer were too small. 12. Marriage is the only where you get to sleep with the enemy. 13. Q: What's an Australian kiss? A: The same thing as a French kiss, only down under. 14. A couple just married were happy with the whole thing. He was happy with the Hole and she was happy with the Thing 15. Q: What are the biggest tragedies in a mans life? A: Life sucks, job sucks, and the wife doesn't. 16. Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? A: Breasts don't have eyes. 17. Despite the old saying, ' 't take your troubles to bed', men still sleep with their wives! fuck a mature Lagrange Maine
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