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being supportive, dufus. You assumed that since she said there was nothing you could do for her, then you should leave her to deal with this by herself. Women don't usually think that way. MEN do, but not women. Instead, women usually gravitate *towards* each other (or to understanding SOs) for emotional support; not close themselves off to be alone. Rule #1: DO NOT attempt to tell her what she should do to feel better. You're not Mr. Fixit; she doesn't want you to find solutions for her problems. She wants you to hold her hand, listen to her woes, let her cry on your shoulder, and hold her close. That's all. Rule #2: DO NOT blow off her emotions as unimportant, unrealistic, or counter-productive. Just let her vent, cry, complain, or bitch; while you stay out of the line of fire. Once she's vented, she'll calm down and feel better. Rule #3: Understand that "no, there's nothing you can do for me" means this: no, you're not a doctor and you can't fix this cancer for me. But I'm, and I don't want you to know how I am; so I'm going to tell you that you can't help, while at the same time I *expect* and *need* you to stand ready to catch me when it becomes too much to handle by myself. So yes, there's nothing you can do FOR me. But there's a whole lot you can do to make me feel better while I go through this by myself. Make sense? Send her flowers, make homemade goofy cards to tell her you're thinking of her, fix her favorite dinner, distract her with and other activities, buy her a bear, mow her lawn or rotate her tires for her, or text her for no reason other than to say I you or hear her voice, ask how she's feeling today, stuff like that. woodland hot sax
as are most leathermen. When provoked by some asshat I do fight back, even fight dirty, but check my post right before this one, you'll the real me, holding my autistic daughter in my arms while tears stream down my face because I somehow want it to be my fault so I can fix it. I think it helps clarify why I went totally apeshit a couple days ago when one of the trolls decided my disabled younger daughter was a fair target. Of course, since that time I've been accused of being a molester on. Nice guys. i need attention and fastis no doubt i have had "challenges" with other posters funy thing is i tend to respond exactly how i am responded to. It just seems that if there is anything outside of some tacid aggreemnt with what is being posted is not welcomed warmly. Also bear in mind there are plenty that come to my defense even though they even disagree with me. You have no reason to parse words or be creaful with me just dont recoil in horror and disgust because i do not fit into some little box. We all get stereotyped to some extent and because i am not your cookie cutter kinkster i have gotten exactly that. The last thing want to do however is make any one feel uncomfortable or tired. I have purposely tried to avoid certain topics when they come up and in the end maybe i just don't belong here. Only time tell i guess. Probably best to leave at that and at least we have an understanding. adults dating
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