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Thank you for recognising me.. (so to speak) I this, more than I've loved anyone and so I have to remain open. No matter what happens I don't want to hate him, I don't want to make him feel shame. I don't want him to lose my family or anything that he has worked for. We've actually talked about all of that. I want us both to be happy, both to be safe. There is so much more to this story so this really isn't just me pointing the finger at him. Him and I became so entangled for reasons way beyond our control but once you go down that hole it's hard to become less tangled. I do understand that he doesn't want to hurt me and that is (part of)why he lies. I have mentioned counceling but he's opposed because of past experiences. I'm willing. And I check out the Weekly, I hadn't thought about that as a resource. Thanks for all your encouragement Whittier county nsa friends
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