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Thanks all for the posts. Why did I her? The best answer I could give as to why we've taken so steps together is. Throughout our time together, there have been periods of functioning that have given me. Some where longer than others but all were very good. I've seen the partner I could have. Unfortunately, we are in a down-turn for about a year now. Therapist is encouraging meds and we be close to restarting them (they worked in the past). My wife is in the field and sometimes the cobblers have no shoes. I think the is too old for PPD. She's been seeing a therapist for a while and there has been no mention of that but who knows. I've talked to my wife before on good days and bad. The conversation turns a good day to bad and a bad day to hell. She feels guilty which makes her angry with me. At times, she told me to leave if I'm so unhappy. Since I'd rather not talk to her, I clam up which leads to resentment. I think Ubel's post is spot on "What if she's doing absolutely the best she can? What if it takes every once of graymatter she has in her skull just to make it through the day?". This is where we are and I'm trying to live with it but I'm human I can get angry and that can lead to hate sometimes. Maybe I don't hate her but I hate the situation. As for SillyJoe's post, I'm thinking about whether my needs are needs or preferences. Again, I'm trying to find peace in where we are now but not resent her.
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I have been through the ringer, lived life enough to screw my life up, rebuild and repeat. That doesn't make me special, it makes me old. Life beat the living shit out of me and till something came along that I finally grasped we are all responsible for our own condition. Think on that all the shit that happens to you and you are still responsible for one thing..YOU. That's about it. That is all you can control. Now I can sympathize and I can imagine what I might do in your shoes or at least I would do. How I to handle all these kinds of things now that I know what doesn't work. With honesty, the real truth and not my perception of it. That means I have to admit I don't know the answers but only what appears to be. So a duck speach would go something like this: "-, I you but I really feel like we have lost the intimacy and physical attraction we once shared. I don't know exactly what's going on from your side of things but I feel like we are distancing from each other. I want more physical with you like we once had, I know we can't be like we once were, we have real lives and the, different goals and challenges. I'm not blaming you, I need to explain what I am going through so you understand. I feel like we aren't sharing in a lot of areas, I know I'm guilty on that side too so I'm coming here to share with you what's going on. I want to be very clear here, what I want is for us to be happy together, to find a way that we can visit the old us and build what we do have. I know there are a lot of things that are good with our lives but I am not satisfied with how we are together. I'm here to address it as your partner. I've tried some things and obviously I haven't done some of those things right so I'd like to listen to you right now, so I'm asking that we talk about this." Asking is important, once done you have answers, even if there is no response, that IS an answer. How you react to it is up to you. jus friends or maybe moreAs she spread her silky legs with one foot into the hot tub where you set the light to dim in hopping to romanticize not to open a can of rotten beans, and eat it too ,to destroy her. For example; my neighbor lost her dad in the ocean from drowning last yr. The tragic got the better of her till this day but that's non of your business. She hurdles on along life tracks with her peers to the finish the hunch was when her legs were wide spread and nipples frozen from the bare,she hears a dog bark from afar and a sound of human saying " Daddy" she then,changed her mind and never got wet. divorced woman
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