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looking for a squirter seriously That therapist sounds like a quack. Are you sure it really was a therapist at all? Could have been any bum off the street. don't be bullied into any of this. Your SS is lucky to have any of his college paid for by anyone other than himself. Not to be harsh on SS, but if your STBX wants to drag him into this bs that should only be between you, don't fall for his emotional blackmail. He knows you your SS and is using that against you. Where is BM? Is she dead? That's the only reasonable excuse for her to not have a duty here.
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