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But I think the most obvious is that it takes time to get to know someone, no matter how times you propose to them and commit to them. I feel, and it is probably not a popular opinion, but to me marriage and engagement doesn't mean anything on it's own. The marriage and engagement of two people, with all their strengths and weaknesses is what matters. Marriage and life time commitment mean different things to you both. This probably should have been brought up during the first few months of a relationship, it's possible you jumped (both of you) into this too fast and now are paying the price. I think you both need time. Both of you need to figure out what relationship you want. But most importantly for you, if you really want to get married, you have to act on it. Get engaged, set a date, plan a wedding. Otherwise it's just wishful thinking. wells cafe blondehey caped crusader, i am saddened by your news. i haven't ever been on here before, but i can't sleep lately b/c of my own beast and wander onto things. i agree, "fuck cancer." my sis has mbc with bone metastases i've c-rc with the same. last week, she'd a new spot on her lungs and her clinical trial chemo isn't working. she's brave enough to do napalm. i won't. i'm 6 months past my expiration date. i guess what i'm trying to get at is what i told my sis when she found out about her recurrence: we're statistical anomalies, she i, probably you too. we could've been dead from tons of other factors in our lives. now, based on one variable (cancer)vs. all other variables that make each of us unique, doctors date stamp our asses and scare the shit out of us. the truth is, we are less likely to fit this longevity probability doctors give us than so others that actual fit our uniqueness-except when we add fear, anxiety, stress, etc. to the one variable, which we of course do when we get the damn label. please, rock out your statistiy significant self. i am trying to. i have my sister is. i hate cancer. i hate my pain. it scares the shit out of me. i hate that my sister is experiencing it just steps behind me. but we're strong women. i have cancer, but cancer is not who i am. if i hadn't stumbled upon this forum your post or whatever these are ed, i would've gone to bed tonight feeling my bone pain more intensely b/c i'm today. thanks for sharing where you are. it gives me more strength to do the same b/c i don't talk about my cancer; seeing how bravely you shared with a group of women who obviously care about you, your post got me to respond and to that i need to share with my people. thanks for the reminder. you're right. bone cancer isn't good-in terms of doctors' diagnoses/ prognoses. but it's just cancer. and it's your body. i'm 6 mos past my exp. date which was 18 mos w/o napalm. yes, i've pain, but i am positive about things: i actually can work a full-time job, i've a network of kick-ass people, i take care of my dog, i wipe my own ass i don't have sponge baths. not bad for someone who should be marinating in the ground. it is not good, as you say, but it's not bad either. i have no idea what my "stage" is according to an. i'm working on "happy". safe travels. thanks for being a light dating single woman
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