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That would be silly to ask about shaving cream, no? Basiy the client can use therapy however they would like. If they want to talk about their mother, they can. If they have a treatment goal then the therapist can guide the person back to the subject or ask "would you like to talk about your mother rather than the goal you addressed or do you think they are linked somehow? Would you like me to redirect you when you seem to get off topic of your goal or would you like to add a goal to your treatment?" Sure can get those age old questions down but what about follow up? And what if they don't apply? And LISTENING and reflecting what one sees going on in the client are huge, a computer can't so much do that. How to pick questions? Sheesh. I guess it's instinctual to a point. You explore a topic. "My never listens to me!" When you say "listens" do you mean he isn't showing the response you want? He ignores the words? He doesn't do as he's asked? Why does it bother you? What would you like to happen? Does he listen to teachers? His father? other people in his life?Do you feel other people in your life listen to you? Not all therapists come up with all of these questions. Some therapists are more intuitive and some are more seasoned and lots are just plain bad. How did you come up with your questions for me? You are exploring a topic that was raised. Getting into the nooks and crannies. Could a computer ask the same questions you did? It requires interest in your client, compassion, insight, experience, guidance (all therapists have supervision to be sure they are handling things well), knowledge, curiosity .probably a lot more I'm not thinking of. Do all therapists have all of these things? NOPE. just broke up need rebound girl nowMaybe it's a "control freakout", but I just can't help but possibly this as hesitation on his part. He has been vague, indecisive, on the fence since day one. At 5mo of dating I asked him where we stand (bf/gf?) he responded: "I definitely feel like I'm in a relationship w/ you, I that, but there are still some things I'm unsure about". I said "okay" dropped it. Two days later, on his he lists himself as "In a Relationship". I had to actually ask him he said "Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that- w/ you!" I was happy, but *sigh*. Then the ? was "Is he moving in or moving away?" 'Cause after I brought up that he should “think about” (figured I'd give him time to mull it over) moving in, he started talking about moving out of state! Tired of it, after really going over it in my head, I told him I couldn't do it anymore. I him, I wish him luck, but I need to move forward w/ my life. I was okay w/ that decision, though I was very hurt. After a year of "I don't knows" "I you, but"'s, I was fed up. He didn’t have to move in, but to suddenly start saying “I move to FL” after leading me to believe he had changed his mind (as aforementioned, he mentioned it early in the relationship, but then seemed to begin to make plans here instead). Hours later it was "I you, I think we can have a great life together", "I'm sorry I don't talk more", etc I thought "he's afraid of losing me or being the one left behind", but I talked it out with him- gave it a shot. Two days later: "I think my dresser would fit nicely here ". Within a week, boxes moving in. Now this. On the same note, he's talking about our next house /but he doesn't know if he can ever actually me. (Not that I’m ready, but eh!?) At one point, he said he didn't think he could ever move in w/ me. (He hates that I'm divorced, but has developed a great relationship w/ my.) So, if I'm feeling frantic, it's cause I feel I deserve him to shoot straight. I hate the knot in my stomach. I appreciate that he loves me has tried ( succeeded) one step at a time to get over his apprehensions w/ me (he was terrified of the at first, still dislikes the idea of my ex bein’ in my life, etc…), but geez! looking for friendship
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