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51 yr old looking for playmate But I'm kind of confused I'm not sure if I'm attracted to girls per se, but I feel more like I'm attracted to THIS one as an individual. I don't know. But anyway, I kept the emotions tucked away because the nature of our casual 'friendship' was never supposed to have emotions involved. But here's another thing that's messing with my head. She is engaged. And her fiancee doesn't know about the whole thing actually before all this, she told him that she wanted to try hooking up with a girl in general, and he shot it down saying that it would be cheating (which is understandable), and they never re-visited the issue. I feel guilty of being involved with someone who's attached because I'm usually a ethical person. So, I know that I need to remove myself from this whole situation, but I'm finding it difficult. I actually care about her now, and I know that if I get in too deep, it's just going to mess with me even more because she doesn't wanna get emotionally involved (neither did I but I can't help the way I feel now). Sometimes she tells me things like fights she's been having with her fiancee (has nothing to do with me or her bi-curiosity), and she'll tell me that she ended up crying, and it really breaks my heart to know that she felt sad. I find myself thinking about her all the time, even though I know I should get a hold of myself and back away from this situation. Sigh free sex Savanna Oklahoma xxx
but to those that judged me: i do admit that i am a spoiled girl. but i never take advantage of my dates. in fact, i am the opposite of a demanding girl. i have a nice life of my own and i've always been able to spoil myself with or without men. if there was one thing i wanted a guy to provide for me that i can't on my own, it's just companionship and commitment. that being said, i do enjoy when my dates go out of his way to treat me like a while i am too, a generous girl. it's not about the gifts,money or 's about the effort a guy puts in for me. and i know and am able to reciprocate with thoughtful gifts and doing nice things for him too. he has also showed no signs of being a player. always supporting me in everything i do, and telling me he'd be a great father someday, how he thinks my parents are so lucky to have a daughter like me..and how he admires his dad blablabla.. it became very hard for me to believe a guy like him could be an asshole :( when he broke up with me,i continued to care for him hoping it change his mind. i wanted to prove that i am a good gf and that i can make his life better. if i acted desperate, it was because i truly wanted something more meaningful with him. i cut him off when i didn't want to be hurt everyday anymore:( but he refused and told me he always be my friend. i disagreed, but he never stopped inviting me out for innocent activities. and i slowly started talking to him like b4. when i agreed to out more often again, it was partly out of curiosity, because it has been a year and i wanted to know if i have really moved on. or even just to prove to myself whether he really cares for me as a friend, or he's an asshole and i should hate him. yet i realized i still have so much feelings for him. I started being nice to him again, even agreeing to design his place free(i'm an interior designer) a part of me just want him to remember me as a girl that did her best, if we were to never talk to each other again after this. as i force myself to move on. i do admit that i am selfish for doing this to my current date. but we are all selfish when it comes to. my can't decide what my heart chooses. my current date doesn't make my heart beat the same way..although his and kindness is slowly healing me. it still doesn't feel the same way :( i don't get any "butterflies". porn dating Denver Colorado
I met my husband 5 years ago and we got married over a year ago. I have done nothing but help him and be there for him mentally, emotionally and financially. In return I keep getting left behind like a toy on a shelf. He only comes around when he sees fit and then has the nerve to say he is taking care of me. I have been an independent woman practiy all of my life and when we got married we were supposed to start trucking together and making a life together. Instead that hasn't happened and he has since stopped telling about the business we are supposed to be starting together and decided to include his sons, who are also truckers, instead of me. About 6 months ago when it looked like things were going to take off and we bought our first rig, I left my company driving job to go with him. Sadly that didn't happen and he has been leaving me with my family and only coming around once in a while to visit and hardly ever sends me money to even live on. I decided that since he is acting this way, it is time for me to walk away and start my life over again since he obviously doesn't want to be with me. I'm big on being a person that stands behind my words and he apparently doesn't feel he has to do the same thing. He claims to me and that he's doing all this for me, but yet he still doesn't support me or devote the time to our marriage like a normal person would. I'm not wrong for feeling the way I'm feeling Am I? bbw fuck date Santa rosaafford not to. But because I don't the need to have a two bedroom apt. I lived on 23 acres in a big ole house. And actually rented out the bedrooms I wasn't using. When I got tired of maintaining it I simply sold it. Put the money in the bank and moved into a nice one bedroom apt. big enough for 2 to live in but not so big I have to hire a maid. never was big on material things. Not into jewelery or clothes. Something that's nice and looks fine is great with me. I much rather spend my money traveling. I honestly couldn't care less about what my car looks like. As as its clean and runs well. But I say it would get me crazy if there were dishes in the sink. It just bothers me. But that comes fro living in the city and worrying about roaches climbing on dirty dishes. No matter how clean you were in my old neighborhood in Brooklyn. if there was a dish in the sink the roaches would come. They came from the person next door who wasn't so clean. black girl
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