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of wanting to leave. Can't find the post, but somewhere in this thread the OP said she's been wanting to leave for a time. More importantly, there's more than one kind of blind spot. You and others accept her statement that he's a great guy and it's a relationship. Yet how often do we posters who say: My relationship is PERFECT, except for cheating/lying/drinking/violence or some other horrifying issue. While those be extreme cases, the fact remains: a lot of people have trouble seeing their relationship objectively. The OP has given it years. There are dozens of subtle ways people can suck the life out of each other. Read about conflict averse relationships: they can be stifling, inauthentic, deadly boring, and hell to get out of because both parties are too damn nice. The OP doesn't really know what's wrong, but feels like she's in prison. That doesn't necessarily mean she or her partner is the bad guy. But to me, it DEFINITELY means she should move on. ago I had a relationship with an uber nice guy who was crazy about me. I remember struggling to explain why I wanted to leave and am grateful to a friend who told me I didn't need a reason, didn't owe the world an explanation. I now that he was clingy, dependent, hadn't developed his own personality and was feeding off my energy/interests/ideas. Nicest effing in the world, but I'd have been institutionalized if I'd married him. searching for some old friends
Recently my husband and I went on vacation. We drove through 4 states over 7 days. We planned a couple of things in some of the cities we knew we wanted to spend more time in. The rest of the trip was completely unplanned. One of the planned activities was visiting his childhood vacation spot for a few days and fishing there. He had always before gone there in so it was familiar, and satisfied that "itch" he had to go there, but it was still new and different because he'd never been there in the. Seeing him enjoy the surroundings was fun for me. That was one of the most fun vacations I've ever had. It was fun for him, because as the planner, he got to do some of the specific things he wanted to do, and it was fun for me, because 75% of the trip involved other locations and activities. So for me there was variety and spontaneity. There must be some wiggle room with one (or both?) of you to be a bit more flexible. If either of you can start to bend just a little, chances are the other person give a little too. black seeking 1st Cheneville, Quebec.. why the separation. Multiple factors. 1. I'm working class born and raised, and believe that an adult should work and contribute. Ex does not want to work, despite both education and experience. I do not agree with it. 2. I'm a "keep the kitchen/bathroom etc clean kind of guy". Not anal about it, but kitchen counters get cleaned daily, and floors about every 3 weeks. The ex is the exact opposite. Fortunately the house we share has full in-law apartment in basement.. so two kitchens in house. The them "dad's kitceh" and "mom's kitchen" now. Dad's is clean. Mom's.. well.. there was a spill on one spot of the floor on July 31 , the day we separated. It's still there. I kid you not. 3. I prefer non-processed food, and meals cooked from scratch. Not only for me, but the as well. When I make their lunch they have a lunch. When the ex does, well.. lets just say it's "processed food of the day". 4. I believe in a level of chores, responsibility and rules for the. Nothing overboard, and more lax than parents. Ex believe parent should do everything for the. So.. it's dad that taught 9 year old to make scrambled eggs.. egg-in-a-hole. and others. And its dad that taught the how to do laundry. The list goes on and on. You don't have enough time, and neither do I. Lets just say that my (both of whom are academiy and artistiy gifted) NEED me here for a while longer yet. largest online dating site
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