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Do you have clear-cut goals? What are they (if you're willing to share)? I have always had clear-cut goals, and have frequently written them down, or written about them. Some are simple and clearly defined, like no wheat, sugar or animal products from 1 Sept 1. Some are fuzzier with no clear end, but are in my mind simply as the next step to take, such as the class I'm starting, the outcome of which is hazy and as-yet-undetermined. Similar to the "scheduling" poll, my goals in my teens and 20s were clearly outlined with an action plan. The events of my teens and twenties have driven home the meaning of a couple of sayings: Be careful what you wish for and Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans. So now, rather than attempt to plan out all the steps needed to reach my goal, I concern myself with the choices in front of me *right now* and ensure the choices I make are moving me in the direction in which I want to travel. Have your goals changed over time? Absolutely. I'd say over time, I put less energy into attempting to control a lot of aspects of my life, and I embrace more possibilities by not making decisions about everything immediately. What do you do when you complete your goals? Depends on what it is. If there's a moment of achievement like graduating from a school or getting a business, we celebrate with friends and food. If it's personal, like finishing a book, losing weight, reaching an understanding of something that was puzzling me, I just feel quietly satisfied. sex dating Kearney Nebraska
Haugen is right that the marriage divide is largely generational, and in reading her candid statement, I couldn't help thinking that this is how my parents felt when I told them I was, when I met my partner, and when we got married. Growing up in conservative households, they both had what seemed at the time unshakeable convictions about homosexuality. At the tail end of the '90s, meant AIDS, and even once I convinced them that I might get through life without contracting HIV, they still thought that the "- lifestyle"—which in their imagination must have consisted of meth-fueled orgies and cross-dressing—led inexorably to unhappiness. Years passed without their nerdy, neurotic kid starring in a porno, and they begrudgingly came to accept that I'd quite simply grown into a nerdy, neurotic adult. But they ed my boyfriend my "friend" until I'd had enough and made a stink about it, after which they reluctantly gave in, ing him—haltingly, under their breath—"your boyfriend." By the time we got married a year ago, they just ed him, and they drove all the way from Arizona to Washington. (my mom is deathly afraid of flying) for the wedding. Having your core beliefs challenged is indeed uncomfortable, and it takes courage. I'm partially making fun of my parents here, and there's a lot that's funny—my mom once asked me, after I told her that I was helping coordinate Trans Awareness Week at Yale, "Are you transgender now?" But the point is that having a challenged of their expectations and forced them to change. This process wasn't short—it took ten years—and to say it was "uncomfortable" for them is an understatement. Absolutism is comfortable. This is why those on the other side of the marriage divide often talk about how "commonsense" their opposition is and assail people like Haugen for being "moral relativists." But rather than representing a lack of conviction, Haugen's respect for those who believe and live differently from her is its own ethic—one that forms the basis for a humane and equitable society. joanne Escanaba blondeBeautiful couples looking sex dating Greensboro penpals dating
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