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is that you have described your boyfriend as a person who varies between "-'s out" and "clouds completely over" person. Now, we all have our moods, days and energy levels. But I had a boyfriend who sounds like yours once. So I would wonder whether there is anything about your bf that is secretive, a side of him or his life that you don't know. And whether his "fear of being controlled" is a need for HIM to be in control and to keep you at arm's length or whatever his chosen reach is of the day. I don't know if this makes any sense to you, but I would deem mood shifts of the "now he's here/now he's completely gone" variety a bit of a red or at least yellow. free fuck buddies online 80525Look, here's the problem: The OP has not defined the abusiveness. Is it emotional? Physical? WE don't KNOW. The OP did not appear to be panicking over her situation, but rather, reflecting on what the next steps need to be done in order to extricate herself. Everyone on here went ape-shit when she used one of the trigger words, "-", but the fact is that can take forms, of which do not place the OP in imminent danger of loss of life or injury, and can allow some deliberate action and planning, instead of just knee-jerk reaction. I know this because I am on the managing board of a respected woman's shelter where I live, and I have handled the phone s from women who ARE in fear for their lives. Someone who writes in on is not in imminent fear. I've worked thru the maze of and social services available for the women who find themselves kicked, beaten, sexually assaulted, shot at, etc, had their held hostage for their "behavior" you name it, I can probably top it. Do YOU get the 1 AM phone from a woman whose husband has locked her out of the house because he's decided she needs to be put in her place? Shelters are fine and serve a purpose, but they are a bandaid on the situation. have time limits that limit how one can stay and then what? And that's IF you can find a shelter that has space. That is our biggest challenge. I've got a list as as my arm of shelters and safehouses, and finding one with space usually require a minimum of to phone s. To tell a woman who not be in imminent peril to drop her life and go to a shelter is knee-jerk and reactionary. And if you actually READ my post instead of jumping all over it, you'll that I suggested that she contact legal aid if she can't afford an attorney. We don't KNOW what her financial situation is, ok? You are assuming that she is penniless and destitute. For all we know, she might have a better job than her husband. WE don't KNOW, ok? don't assume. You'd be surprised at the number of s we get from women whom you'd never suspect of being victims of domestic. They have nice homes, their are nice who aren't in trouble, they have jobs but there's something in their relationship that is broken. black singles dating
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