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How not to be eaten by a Duck Avoid smearing yourself in stale breadcrumbs unless absolutely necessary. If threatened by a duck, climb a tree. Ducks, usually excellent climbers, refuse to share trees with anything. a large automatic weapon with you whenever walking past a river or pond. Become a microbiologist and develop a duck form of myxomatosis. Become an electronics whizz and build a battery-powered thingy that repels ducks by means of ultrasound. Become a physicist and repel ducks. And everything. a tin whistle in your shirt pocket or handbag and practise duck-charming techniques to buy time to escape, should you be threatened. Move to Siberia. As far as I know, no ducks live near there. If you can't beat them, join them: Whilst ducks be vicious, they are civilised creatures and the idea of cannibalism disgusts them. Rather than just getting another pullover from your granny next Christmas, ask her for a duck costume instead. Do everything in your car. Eat in it, sleep in it, perhaps even travel in it. Never leave your car. Remember to check it for ducks first. Go on a safari holiday to Africa, go to the lions and jump out of the Land Rover into the middle of a hungry pride. I'd like to a duck try to reach you then. Contract Anorexia Nervosa and wear tight clothing to make sure the ducks realise they'd be wasting their time eating you. Sneak onto the set of a film about the middle ages and steal some chain mail. Ask God to reconsider whether they were worth putting on the planet in the first place. Be polite. Make friends with lots of plump, tasty-looking people. about with them all the time, after making sure you can run faster than all of them. Do not mistake ducks for geese. Geese allow themselves to be petted and stroked and even hand-fed whilst ducks take your arm off at the first available opportunity. would see you at black adult hooker slo
hi. some questions. Im not from around here, but was sent here to study~ The culture here is % different that what i experienced back home. One of them is in the title. I might watch too much of, but to insult someone or to be shocked when an 18 yrs old girl is a virgin makes me wonder. Is it not a big deal for someone being a virgin b4 she/he gets married? eg of movie : house, which i watched just now, and want some clarification from u people/canadians. thanks. just a question, no hard feeling any women in recoverysorry for the top post but that's now yesterday's news. When I read that thread below I had to post this poem I wrote. The following is the true story of my good friend My good friend used to work for the as a benefits evaluator for the welfare plan He spent day after day in the presence of losers The addicts, the whores, ihe dregs and the boozers All wanting their piece of the free handout pie They stop at nothing to gain it they steal, cheat, and lie Thanks to the system hey all got their share This bothered my friend, it didn’t seem fair But had a plan, he would master his fate! And make a transition away from the state He got a new job with no skills whatsoever He bullshit his way in My good friend was clever He rode high on the tide during the hot crazy To gain title and wealth during those wild, fast paced days He through outrageous parties and out with the boys He spent all his cash on wine, women, and toys For who could have thought this could come to an end? But dark days were ahead for, my good friend He lost his job when the bubble had burst The market was flooded and he was the worst Of the website designers programmers and techies for hire on the cheap (demand dropped for those trekkies) Competition was fierce for the few jobs to be found No room for a pothead this time around Where could he turn to with his fond of weed? Far more that a habit, for him, it’s a need! High tech had no use for a breaker of rules So he got a job Teaching In our state sponsored schools It was fun for a time and it lasted awhile But Mark’s heart wasn’t in it it wasn’t his style His eyes had been opened His dreams had be shattered His hopes and ideals were irreparably scattered continued international dating sites
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