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and my attorney said to NOT change custody report since the ball is in my court. The last of our mediation report said that if anyone moved out of the county, the would be the sole responsibility of the staying party. He has not done anything to change our agreement (probably because he doesn't want to pay an atty) but the holidays are nearing and now he wants us to notarize a holiday schedule. The problem is, he works as a restaurant manager so his schedule does not always allow him to spend time with DD. If I give her up every other Christmas, she just might be staying home alone while he is at work. I'd like to work around every schedule instead (if he's off this Christmas, he can have her, etc). Am I being unethical? Also, we had a split before he left. support was only set at about $ since we make about the same money. He has not offered or asked about her welfare in regards to school clothes, coats, etc (full time care is me!). Do most parents just wait until support hearings are set or do they actually step up and make sure things are okay? Holon horney bitch n Holon
They're a community org local to you providing services and support for queer women in abusive relationships: The Network/La Red: -*** I don't think it's at all extreme to request a transfer from your manager. In fact, if your workplace has more than one location, transferring to an entirely new job site would be even better. It would probably be inconvenient, but it sounds like you're having a lot of trouble with keeping her away from you, which between that and being closeted makes me think going the human resources route wouldn't work for you. That said, if you can't transfer or find another job, the place above could also help you with locale-specific advice as far as what you could do to stay safe in your workplace. I'd especially ask about how to talk to management/HR, and look into support and counseling for learning to stand up for yourself while respecting your need for self-protection. Sometimes those two needs seem opposed to each other, but it's definitely possible to have both. It take awhile to learn how, and you'll likely stumble a lot to get there, but peace and sanctuary within and out lie at the end. As for how to do all that, at heart I think it starts with you deciding you're worth it, and certainly worth living this one life with. Then you'll have a place to start when it comes time to tell your abuser to go away and stay away for good, while taking whatever action you need to completely disengage yourself from them. If studs are your core attraction, there are plenty around who would treat you with and respect. Lying, cheating, and bullying for sex aren't acceptable no matter how anyone identifies. I you'll be able to find what you need to get out of this relationship. Partner in butch/femme relationships does exist, just as it does in any other kind of relationship; just with b/f, some of it tracks along fairly traditional gender lines. Your local support should be of help without trying to pathologize who you are and what you like, and the same should go for the important people in your life. women interested in writing back forth with apurse? 1. No money to buy gas you have less than tank. 2. No calendar. 3. No credit cards. 4. No lipstick. 5. No key to office. It was a toss-up between 4 5, with 5 finally winning when the boss shows up he has no key either. Then the 6 people with whom he has a 7:15 meeting also show up! Fortunately, I had my cell phone he ed the building manager to come unlock the door. It's a good thing the manager's office is just a couple of away. Now I just have to get through the day with no lipstick I get home on the fumes of gas in the tank! woman seeks male
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