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Butch and genderqueer work very well for me. Girl and don't work well. Lesbian, dyke and woman works sortakinda ok. Not ideal because of the gender stuff I have going on which swings me in the male direction, but I let it slide when others use it. The people who are close to me know not to use them, and also understand why I can be both a little tweaked yet not particularly fussed at the same time. Speaking of which, I have *dun dun dun* a story! The ethnic breakdown of my kitchen is fairly typical of the average kitchen: mostly white boys working on the line, a couple girls, with me pushing the curve out a bit, and Mexican dishwashers. One of the dishwashers is an older Mexican guy, and whenever he needs to get by someone in our cramped kitchen while toting an armload of stuff, he says "Excuse me señor" or "Excuse me señorita". For the first months I was there, he'd always me señnor. It didn't bother me, I generally don't care which pronouns people use because either set are close enough. But, I mentioned my amusement to one of the servers, and she told him in spanish that I was a mujer, not a hombre. He turned really, really red. I kinda felt bad because really, I didn't care. So he started ing me señorita, which in retrospect, fits a lot worse than señor, but whatever, right? That lasted about 3 days. He reverted to señor after that, of his own accord. Make of this what you. 8-) bm looking for a friendand am used to knowing if I make a wrong move I could die. It's a diff. fear, a trust fear, a pain fear, I guess I'd be willing to do it with the right person but I'm well aware of the pushing limits and coming thru onto the other side and raising the bar/skill level aspect of life in general. NO, my own drool does not bother me and I knew it would be messy, I was not turned on at all, it was an amusement/interaction. I'm going sailing, thanks for asking me about this, thinking and feeling is nice but being asked questions brings new stuff to light. TTY find friends online
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