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But if I were expecting to eat somewhere a little fancier, I'd be a little miffed that I wasn't told until after I had gotten myself ready to go to a fancier place. -'s is a place with waiters and dishes, too, but I sure as hell wouldn't make any effort to look nice to go there beyond my every day look. The key is knowing this before you're getting ready, though, and not just as you're heading out the door with a nice dress and heels on. I feel the same with Garden, though it's a bit better than -'s, my every day look is fine for there. I'd feel out of place to be dressed up eating at either of those places since can eat there in their soccer uniforms. I'd personally be disappointed if a took me out PERIOD if he couldn't afford to eat out. Eating a nice meal at home is cheaper, tastes better, and is much more romantic anyway. I wonder why this guy didn't even bother to ask his gf if she'd be willing to cover her half or all of the meal so that she could get the food she wanted, and he could get the he wanted. Why is he the only one that pays? His pride? Why didn't he ask her if she'd be willing just to eat the main course from now on and only eat appetizers that are free with the meal? That's really not much to ask, and any woman worth anything would be fine with that. Or why didn't he offer to make dinner with her and possibly go out for dessert? A walk with an ice cream cone is cheap. Or why he didn't ask her why exactly she wanted that particular restaurant but instead chose to come up with his own conclusions as to why? That says a lot about his poor opinion of her. He had so options he could have tried if he'd only have had the to have been a little creative. i need more than a one night thinghere and it would be best to approach from a moving forward perspective. don't spend too dwelling on what has already happened except to give yourself some key notes to work with. In terms of him disappearing for a bit you won't be able to change that. It's very possible he needs time to process things in a quiet and reflective manner. Guilt is a crippling emotion. You did not maliciously do harm. There were two of you emotionally and physiy in the situation; the error was a combination of things between you. As he is taking time for reflection, so too can you. Kink and BDSM are intense activities. It sounds like it was a significant error one that could have been prevented with communication checking in with one another on both the big things and the mundane things every day, since you him that often. Each conversation about wants, needs, desires and fantasies should be talked through to resolution. Both of you have to be willing to slog through it. Yesterday I had a conversation that changed my perspective on something I *thought* I wanted. I would not have wanted either of us to have figured that out in the middle of the scene/play/whatnot. We got to a resolution because I was asked 4 or 5 times "why". That conversation was pursued with intensity and I had to be willing to keep feeding my thoughts until I hit that 'oh wow' moment. If he returns is willing to continue exploring you both need to start nearly exhausting yourselves in discussion over your kink activities. After time you both mature a bit within your play and your discussions be more streamlined you'll make headway easily and comfortably. Even with all the best efforts shit is going to happen. We are humans being. When the two of you come back together you both need to start with compassion and. Return to a bit of vanilla while you work through what happened and how to prevent it. He needs to be reminded of the way your touch and ministrations make him feel and why he puts his trust in you. You need to feel comfortable that he still trusts you. Most importantly to tell you everything even to stop you in the middle of play. old married women wants men
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