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After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Dear Mrs. Woolf, Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Woolf, are listed below and are "documented by our video surveillance cameras": 1. 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking. 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5- minute intervals. 3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom. 4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted in management getting involved causing management to lose time and costing the company money. 5. 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to reserve a bag of chips. 6. 14: Moved a 'CAUTION WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty obliged. 8. 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' Emergency Medics were ed. 9. 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose. 10. 10: While handling guns in the Sports department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were. 11. October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme. 12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his '- look' by using different sizes of funnels. 13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!' Eucumbene Cove black girl
heavy sigh of relief. He was looking forward to this big event, and being away from the beast, as he lovingly ed his bride of 35 years. She opened her eyes looking around the empty room, her breath quick and uneven, realizing that his funeral was last night. She knew she still had a few days of mourning, prior to her date friday night with that hot, sweet and gun safety instructor. The gun safety instructor asked her for a date a few months ago. She knew her husband and his girlfriend would never make a divorce easy. He wanted everything, and made it perfectly clear. He wanted the appearance of a loving wife, and homemaker but he also wanted his mistress. They were in a loveless marriage she knew this to be true. She also knew that a divorce would take time, and money and could be messy, exposing their *perfect* life together. The gun instructor told her several times that there were quite a few recent break ins, in their neighborhood. That she must be careful to shoot first and ask questions later, if she heard anything that sounded strange. She heard the shuffling in the hallway she grabbed her gun, kicked open the door and fired multiple times into the shadow. She remembered his funeral. It was tasteful and elegant. His wife sitting in the front row, her husbands mistress in the back. What he never realized that his lover and his wife were the best of friends . senior mwm seeks friendLonley women wanting single dates men rimming women
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