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The conflicts your feeling are normal, hell they are expected. You're getting a divorce for fuck sake. What are you doing playing with fire? Being hurt and wanting someone to validate you as a human being is nothing new. Damn near everyone wishes they were 'loved' during a divorce, they their ex to some degree, they have second thoughts. Even when they KNOW the best thing is to end it. You have to get your emotions under control and start acting like an adult and mother. Cut this new relationshit off, I know it hurt and you care for the guy he's the shoulder to cry on, support you during these hard challenges..yada yada yada. You have to learn how to be strong all on your own FIRST, it's job one. THEN you won't be so eager to be with someone knew you didn't FIND yourself in a new relationship. Oh hell no, you wanted it, you acted on that wish and got what you asked for. What you're finding out is that it was a mistake shitty timing. So you deal with it. Tell you what, don't take my word for it..head down to Borders or other book store, go online, do some research on dealing with divorce and healing from it. what the experts who get paid say. This new guy has been a bandaid and it soothes but you need to take care of yourself. You won't truly do that pouring the energy into someone new. And don't try and pull some shit like oh but YOU just don't know no babe, you're not that special, which is actually a good thing. You're not more fucked up than other people, you're AS fucked up as everyone going through this kind of shit. Sooner you accept it the sooner you'll start actually doing the things that lead to recovery. don't look for the easy way out ain't there and don't confuse acceptance with 'easy'. It's gonna be hard, its supposed to be. Now get moving and don't introduce you to a new when the ink ain't even final on the last marriage damn. are there any open minded females out there
I also tend to work places physiy demanding with low pay. My previous job would purpously drive people out before the 6month if they could to avoid paying more. I'll get into deep discussions and I'm always polite at first meeting, but names, and most any memorization is not something I do well. Amusingly at my previous job the average time for a new person to last was only a few days. Most never came back after one day, and the shortest was a mother/daughter pair who only lasted two hours. Between the smell, the grime, the high temps, and all the bite marks it was a very high turn-over. Now at the farm I'm not usually the one training, and boss is way better at names than I. Still, most people vanish after they learn the work is not easy. gal looking to Curtis Nebraska downthe earliest memory i have of my father was laying in bed with him, both of shirts off. I'm not sure if there was a sexual componet to this or not. i think i remeber my mother coming in and getting mad at him ( they split before i was born) and i never really saw him that much. the second earliest memory i was 6 and my sister 11, she asked me to look inthe bathroom and tell her how big his penis was while he was peeing. that last one gives me chills, but my sister and I get along OK today, but I've never brought it up to her because im afraid to her reaction to it, she might deny it, or tell our mother or what ever idk. thats not the issue. but when i was 11, my mother married and the who i now refer to as my stepdad. He used and her, he cleaned up real quick ( my momma don't take shit from no one!!!) but this did alter my view of him and made me more distrustful of men. now im 23 and i have a two good guy friends and have been in (semi) relationship. the thing is I've also been bi-sexual, I don't think i could do a relationship with a unless he was straight acting and really really laid back. basiy i want a "bro" who i could have sex with. and i hate guys and their fucking drama!!!! there just so fucking picky! i can't stand it. its like every guy I've met has had to find SOMETHING to complain about it drives me NUTS. my therapist said this could be a repulsion to men out repulsion to my won feelings, but i don't think so, i think it's that i hate picky people in general. now i feel like if i found a good mentally woman who loved me and wasn't a pshycho ( my first and only ex GF would try to make everything my fault and make me feel guilty even though she admitted to being in the wrong) it could work out.( keep in mind that the reason i only had one GF is because I've been focused on school and work) but i do still fantasize about guys, and their dicks, i wonder sometimes when i a really attractive guy walking down the street ( jackman type) how big their is. is this an effect of what happened to me as a? did it make me bi-sexual? I think if i really found true with a woman that this wouldn't be an issue. do you agree? interracial personals
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