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always a "right one". I don't think it's a fantasy, but I do think it can be a reality. I'm not inclined to settle for less, but I'm not living my life in such a way that if that doesn't happen I'll be horrendously disappointed. I don't what's so wrong with wanting to share your life with someone who is an amazing fit. That, to me, would be "the right one". But I'm always pleased when I meet people who can be good fits. I know they not be ultimately, but when something fits comfortably and the outlook seems positive, there really isn't anything wrong with wanting to wear that. It's like my most wonderful pair ever of ass jeans. I know I look good in them, and they are more comfortable than any I've ever had. That's so awesome to me, I always go for quality comfortable jeans now, because I know they're worth the expense. newly single white male;-) I'm honest. But I try to not be hurtful. So unless he looks awful/inappropriate, I'm not likely to say anything. But I can almost always find one thing to compliment a guy I'm with on, and I try to focus on those things. I've noticed that when I compliment my guy, I'll the same thing (or similar clothing items) show up more often. My fave ex has this Jennings sleeve t. He was wearing it one of the first times we met, and it really looks good on him! I loved it both because he looked good, and because it reminded me of our honeymoon stage, and I'd always compliment him when he wore it. We've gotten together over drinks about 12-15 times since we broke up and probably 5 of the times he was wearing it. Last time it happened, I teased him (kindly) about it, and asked whether his gf should be worried was he trying to sweep me off my feet? And he laughed and said "You made me feel good whenever I wore it, so I wear it a lot because it makes me feel good." He also said that I always made him feel as though I was proud to have him by my side when we went places, so he'd try to pay attention to my compliments so he'd know I could be proud. Does that make sense? It's like reward-based training. (I know I get flak for this.) If you recognize and praise the things you like, you'll that more often. I find too, that as the praiser, I look more for things that I like, rather than things I don't so I overlook minor things that are non-issues that I might otherwise focus on like in his case, it'd be that he *always* wore stained black carhartts pants, never jeans, or cords, or what not. Honestly, if I'd focused on that, it would have bugged me to no end. Instead, I it as one of his quirks that make him uniquely him. Anyway. Praise is good for both people. Negativity is bad for both people. I try to set the example of what I'd like and expect from my partner, and honestly? I *-* compliments. mature date
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