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can't why you're still in this relationship. That's easy for me to say, of course, because I'm sure that you (or used to -) this girl. IMO, the fact that you're living with this girl before marrying her is a Blessing you've gotten a to the real person. Unfortunately, a lot of people when dating are on their "best behavior" and "make the best" of showing interest in the same people, sports, hobbies, etc. Sadly, this is the worst thing we can do, but I've been guilty of it myself. To ME, the biggest "red -" is her lack of friends. I say this out of experience, because I briefly dated someone that really didn't have any friends the more time I spent with him, and the better I got to know him, I could understand "why" he was very controlling, opinionated, and (not to be mean) a real pain in the ass to be around for any length of time. The hobbies he did have were solitary, such as reading; he didn't enjoy sports, dinners out, or basiy anything that required interaction with anyone other than me not, in my opinion. It sounds like you have a lot to offer, and really enjoy being active and spending time with your friends. In a relationship, you should be able to balance all of the facets of your life without needing to offer up explanations or reason things away. Although it seems like maybe a small thing, the fact she won't even shave her legs seems a little disgusting to me. It's great that she feels comfortable enough with your relationship to just "be herself" but she just doesn't sound like she gives a damn anymore. I wish you the best, but it looks like it's time to move on. Wish I had some words of encouragement for you! no registration needed chat room SourisIt can't be all one way, or the other nor can it be completely equal. In this area, TRUST and respect matter more than any other. There's bound to be an impasse, no matter what you do. It's those times when one of you HAS to make the decision they feel is best and the other one has to TRUST in that decision and abide by it. You give the power to decide to your spouse, even if you don't agree with it. This isn't so hard to do if you TRUST your spouse to keep your family's best interest in mind. You don't have to agree with his or her decision, but you DO have to trust that s/he is making a fair and just decision. For example, we helped a family member this year with a huge project she needed a ravine cleared of trees, culverts installed, and the whole thing filled in. This required extensive use of a backhoe, chainsaws, crew to help, wear and tear on our equipment and vehicles, risk to life and limb, and $$$MONEY$$$ which neither of us had just lying around. I was deeply afraid for our budget, and argued for the project to be delayed until she could pay for it, or just abandoned (it wasn't a necessity). I could not where we'd get the money. I relented to DH, because I trusted him. And even if the project failed or went bust, I knew he would never risk our own welfare to complete it. Each week, we scrambled to find money for one part or another. We got through it, the job is 70% finished and hold for the, and didn't drive us to the poorhouse, we still eat quite well and stay warm and dry. There are other areas in which DH bends to my, too, even though he disagrees such as maintaining what we need for the house, computer equipment, and managing the weekly budget. It has worked out that he's in charge of the big decisions, and I keep all the mountains of little ones at bay so they don't become big ones. It's a workable balance of power. I don't intrude on his areas of expertise (seeing the bigger picture and planning for the future), and he doesn't intrude on mine (attentiveness to detail, keeping the machine oiled and running smoothly). One reason this works is because we know that trust is earned, not blindly given. We don't just do whatever the hell we want, because we know making a wrong move could damage trust. flirting with women
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