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I think people who come here do listen, at least some of the time, to some of the things people say. Here's the thing: The only two people who really know the dynamics of the relationship are the people in it. We hear the crappy stuff because that's what people have a problem with they don't come to complain about the great stuff. These guys who "treat women like shit" do not start out that way. They start out as charming and nice as any other guy. Actually, they're usually MORE charming and nice than any other guy. These guys can what a woman's weak spot is and find a way to get right into that niche. As an example: I am disabled. I can't lift things. I can't walk very far. I've come to depend on my partner for those things. I have a difficult teenager. She doesn't listen to a word I say but she listens to what her tough southern stepdad says. THAT's the guy I fell for. The one who helps me and my kid and is an all-around great guy. I was with him a time before his mask of awesomeness started flaking away. When it did, I refused to believe it because I liked THE OTHER guy. I couldn't believe the "jerk" and the "great guy" were the same person. Anyway, I believe that advice does slowly seep in, once people filter it through the context of their relationships and sift the good nuggets. I think it takes a while but I think most people do eventually listen. professional white male for hot chocolate
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