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But your entire post was filled with red flags. If this were me, I'd run. There is not the level of commitment, trust and communication needed to make this a lasting marriage. If you are seeing this behavior already, then count yourself lucky. People seldom change unless forced and decide to make the change in their head and heart. If you, I foresee a divorce within a few years, or both of you living a very miserable existence. Sorry. Try the LTR forum, but you MUST get the communication fixed NOW. looking for a certain someone 19 Wisbech 19
most of us have experienced what she's talking about. And then you know what happened? Reality set in. You're trying to perpetuate the existence of the immature, irrational language she is using. Just imagine if she put the same energy, the "hours of crying on the phone", the days of longing for this into getting out there, dating, and finding someone who was right for her. Surprises of all surprises, I'm betting she would find someone who she felt just as strongly, if not stronger for than this guy. Let's forget the fact that this guy is already married, far away, and they haven't seen each other in decades. Let's acknowledge the fact that these sort of feelings aren't. They speak of deep seated dependency issues and a lack of a grasp in the real world. Every time I've ever heard of, or been involved in a relationship where the people "can't live without the other" it's been a very unhealthy situation. phone sex free in MeridenWhen I worked in security, we learned this fascinatingly simple thing they ed Escalation of Force (they even had a cute little professional poster like the kind we had in grade school, except about the proper way to beat people). Anyway, sometimes you tease me because you say I think you act too mean. So now I tease you for accusing me of acting too nice. I think in any situation there are *stages* of response that make sense. In a situation that begins at a low level, the response you detailed IMHO is too. What if the women wasn't even aware that she knew people, and all it would take to turn her to being pro rights was realizing someone close to her was a lesbian? In that case, the best thing you might be able to do would be to friend her and be out, and that could be all it took to open up her world. But if you start out at your stage, then you almost certainly guarantee that she hate all people forever, which seems counter to your stated purpose of having real multiculturalism (and not just some bullshit on paper that no one actually respects, like, say, civil rights for people of color if anything, libertarianism tells us that having big bro put things on paper is not the right direction to go about it). On the other hand, the dude in the bar who kept groping your friend deserved what he got, because a real, concrete person in his own sphere of existence asked him to stop what he was doing and yet he continued to physiy her. So fuck that guy. He started out at a higher level of force, and the appropriate response was in kind. beautiful people
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