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I am frustrated because my husband brings out the worst in me, not the best in me. I am more high strung, less physiy active, less social, and less attracted to him. It comes down to this: the doesn't want to do anything but watch tv, play guitar with his buddies, go online and surf the net, and play with our when he's happy and not in need of a diaper change. He's not Mr. Handy won't fix things around the house (and really, he shouldn't because when he attempts to he gets frustrated and breaks things) doesn't perform routine car/yard/etc maintenance, and cleans occasionally. I feel like the house is always a mess. I'm always busy. And then he has these grand ideas, like gardening, that he starts but then drops interest and so I'm left to do the whole darn thing. And after all this, he wants a b-job and sex. I want to punch him, not cuddle up with him and make sweet soft. I thought about it the other day and realized that I no longer have anything in common with my "former self." The girl that I loved; who after the period of trying to find my identity I found. I live in the country, I'm overweight, I never go out, I am behind on my bills, I have a kid (which is a good thing), and I sit in a messy house. It's gross. I understand that I need to take some responsibility. I've asked him to help. I am an independent woman and I like the idea of but there is no way that's happening. So, do I just say "f-it" and do it all? I mean, if I were divorced I'd have to do it all anyways. This way I get to keep my husband too and perhaps a little more sanity. He's just so f'in selfish. UGH!!! (End of rant). looking for my pittsburgh girl
She shouldn't have to have a bag of tricks or an over the top performance planned for them when they come and visit but I do think that she should be interested in bonding with them making them feel comfortable with her being your girlfriend but also her being their friend as well. In order to keep my not in front of the TV or video games, I have nights a week where I do something special with them one night we do game night, board games are a great way to spend a night together, second night we make an project together Whether it's a home recorded music video or a painting or a giant cookie (which never come out right) and the third night is movie night and we rotate who can pick the movie On the nights that we aren't doing something I encourage them to go outside or play with their toys or read What kind of hobbies do your enjoy, do they play sports or play instruments My 13 yr old daughter loves to write so when she doesn't feel like playing outside I tell her to get her journal and write I also make her practice her guitar every night for 30 minutes, if I left it up to her she would sit infront of the TV or video games but that's the last option I allow her to take I think maybe instead of telling your gf that she needs to entertain them, you guys need to discuss activities you can do together with the, even if it's just for an hour and then you can seperate and have individual time Foxborough meeting swingersThis hit you the hardest because you bought into the whirlwind romance idea. You might have vocalized a more pragmatic stance with him but your emotions were pouncing on the promise that it could be true. Understandable. This hit you hardest than the other relationships because you're in your 30's now. You're ready for serious. You WANT serious. Understandable. All your emotions are understandable but illogical. You have posted that you pointed out the logic of the situation to him times. However, your emotions REALLY wanted to believe and now it's over. You're lucky. REALLY lucky. Imagine being married when he pulled the rug out from under you like that. Imagine having with him when he decided he was "out of now". That would be a whole lot worse. It hurts and I'm sorry but only two months with a guy like that makes you lucky. There. I said it again. Now, you need to tell yourself how lucky you are. Over and over again until you start believing it. You mentioned anger. Sure, I'd be super pissed. However, again, looking at the bigger picture you got out cheap. Vent, journal, cry, eat ice cream, some air guitar, etc. When you're ready make the decision to move on. It won't help to know why he did it. It's his nature and now he's gone. If he comes back? You don't deserve that and after healing you wouldn't WANT that. Let that idea go too. I'm sorry. I you heal from this. 50 plus dating
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