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I'm not a doctor, but I've suffered on and off from mild to severe clinical depression for years (since I was 11 or so). Having been through rounds and rounds of counseling, outpatient treatment, medication, group therapy, etc., (and with a close family member who's now a therapist, largely because of what I went through) here's what I can tell you: There are varying degrees of depression, and it can be caused by things: genetics, chemistry, feeling overwhelmed by life circumstances, prolonged grief, etc. Sometimes more than one factor is at play. In my case, there was childhood molestation, an alcoholic parent, loss of several people to murder and other tragic deaths within a short timeframe, by a teacher, etc. I had a double-whammy in that depression runs in my family, although we suspect it not have always been diagnosed (why didn't a certain great-grandmother ever get out of bed?). So, the factors for me where biological AND situational. Right now, you're focusing on your situation as causing your depression. But that might not be all there is to the story. Sometimes, people go so in a "down" state that the essentially becomes re-wired so that they CAN'T go "up", emotionally. This is where professional help comes in. It doesn't mean you're crazy, or weak or whatever other judgments you have about getting outside help. It means you have a medical condition that needs to be attended to. Would you go a doctor if you'd severed your hand? Because depression does just that it takes away a part of you and prevents you from living as a full person. horny mature ladies in North South Carolina
My grandmother was the same way widowed at 35, and lived until she was 92. She was a vibrant, interesting woman, and when I once asked her why she never remarried, she said, "There was never anyone as good as he was!" However, I think what happened was that she grew up in a time (20s, 30's 40's) when women had far fewer economic opportunities and roles to play. She, however, found a niche and made a tremendous success of it and I don't think she was interested in subjugating herself to another once she had that taste of freedom. It was far easier to be a grieving romantic than it was to explain that she just didn't want to deal with a meddling in her business! Let's face it not all marriges were perfect, and divorce was very uncommon back then. There were a lot of people who, once they were no longer married, had NO to jump back into the frying pan of marriage. Maybe your grandmother had a low sex drive. Maybe your grandmother didn't feel like dealing with another in her life, having to make compromises, etc. You can your own problem "loyalty", if you want to. Personally, I it "fear." But hey, if you don't WANT a relationship, there's nothing wrong with that. But if you do you need to figure out how to re-enter the dating world. You might want to consider a few sessions with a counselor, to understand better what is stopping you from having a and rewarding relationship with another you still have some unresolved issues from your past relationship. discrete naughty girlRelaxed, truthful, fun-loving liberal seeking the same. free single dating online
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